TA •Chapter 37

Cheng Ke didn’t know what Jiang Yuduo thought about being kissed like that. Anyway, after the "ah" he went silent again, frowning the whole time, lost in thought.

Cheng Ke actually really wanted to tell him that at least last time there had still been some tongue. This time they had just fucking brushed lips, not even pressed down properly, so there was no need to look so miserable.

Of course, he couldn’t say that to Jiang Yuduo. If he did, he’d probably get beaten up.

The car stopped downstairs. Jiang Yuduo was sitting on the right side of the back seat. He opened the door and got out first. Cheng Ke followed him out and didn’t shut the door.

Jiang Yuduo glanced at him and reached over to close the door. “Old man, you even need someone to shut the car door for you.”

"You…" Cheng Ke froze. He had thought Jiang Yuduo would just get back in the car and leave, since last time he hadn’t even gotten out before driving off.

The car drove away. Jiang Yuduo turned and headed into the building. “I’m staying at your place tonight.”

"Huh?" Cheng Ke followed him into the stairwell and watched him press the elevator button.

He wanted to ask why, but he didn’t.

He had originally thought that after that kiss, Jiang Yuduo would be so jumpy he wouldn’t want any close contact for at least a few days, but thinking about it again, he seemed able to guess why.

That car that had almost hit him. That car accident that had nearly happened.

Judging from Jiang Yuduo’s reaction, this was definitely not just a simple accident to him.

As for what exactly he was connecting it to, Cheng Ke didn’t plan to ask anymore. He could pretty much guess Jiang Yuduo wouldn’t admit anything, wouldn’t reveal anything, and might even come up with a completely irrelevant answer.

"You brought your keys, right?" Jiang Yuduo asked once they got into the elevator.

Cheng Ke patted both pockets of his coat first, then answered, "Yeah."

Jiang Yuduo gave him a look. "You really should switch to a fingerprint lock. You’re always jumping at shadows like that."

Cheng Ke smiled.

When the elevator doors opened, he was just about to step out when Jiang Yuduo got out ahead of him. That move was slick as hell. If Cheng Ke hadn’t already been suspicious because of everything that had happened before, he never would have noticed, and he also wouldn’t have realized that as soon as Jiang Yuduo got out of the elevator, he quickly scanned the surroundings.

Cheng Ke took out his keys and opened the door. Warm air rushed out from inside, bringing instant comfort.

This time Jiang Yuduo didn’t hurry in first. He followed behind him.

"Want something to drink?" Cheng Ke took off his coat and tossed it onto the sofa.

Jiang Yuduo was about to sit down on the sofa, but Cheng Ke’s throw landed right on the spot he was going to take.

Jiang Yuduo glanced at him and hung the coat on the rack. "Does your place have anything to drink besides tap water?"

"Milk tea," Cheng Ke said. "I bought a bunch of milk tea. You can brew it yourself."

"The kind you tear open from a long strip in the supermarket?" Jiang Yuduo said. "What’s so good about that? I’m not drinking it."

"No," Cheng Ke opened a cabinet and took out two bags of milk tea. "The milk packet, tea packet, and sugar packet are all separate."

"That fancy?" Jiang Yuduo became interested and took one bag, tearing it open to look. "They make stuff like this now?"

Cheng Ke took the kettle to boil water. "Outdated, huh?"

"Yeah." Jiang Yuduo nodded very sincerely. "I’ve never had anything like this before."

When the water was boiling, Cheng Ke glanced at Jiang Yuduo, who had been standing behind him the whole time. "Do you want to take a shower?"

"No," Jiang Yuduo said. "Don’t worry about me. I’m not sleeping tonight either."

"Not sleeping?" Cheng Ke was stunned.

"Mm." Jiang Yuduo nodded.

"Why?" Cheng Ke had already decided not to question any more of Jiang Yuduo’s weird behavior, but he still couldn’t help asking.

It couldn’t be because he was afraid of being molested in his sleep, right?

"Can’t sleep." Jiang Yuduo pulled out a cigarette and lit it. "Go sleep."

"Oh." Cheng Ke turned back to look at the flame on the gas stove. "Then should I find you a few… movies to watch? Nothing scary."

"No need," Jiang Yuduo said. "I don’t need something to kill time."

Cheng Ke didn’t say anything else. Once the water boiled, he put the two tea bags into the cups and poured in the hot water.

Jiang Yuduo came over with great interest and stood beside him, staring at the cups with him. "You bought cups? Weren’t there only one cup before?"

"Yeah, they gave me two little mugs when I bought the milk tea." Cheng Ke said.

"How much did you buy if they gave you two cups?" Jiang Yuduo turned the cups around. "Couple mugs?"

"Huh?" Cheng Ke froze. He hadn’t looked at the cups closely. He had brought them back, disinfected them, and left them there. Only now, after Jiang Yuduo said that, did he look again. He still couldn’t tell how they were couple mugs. They just both had a heart printed on them. "Aren’t they just a matching pair? They’re the same."

Jiang Yuduo used his finger to push one cup toward the other. The cups clinked together, and the two half-hearts on their sides formed one complete heart.

"I guess they’re supposed to be like this." Jiang Yuduo said.

"Oh." Cheng Ke looked. "They really are…"

"You didn’t know, did you?" Jiang Yuduo glanced at him.

"No. I’ve never even used them." Cheng Ke said.

Jiang Yuduo seemed to want to say something, but in the end he didn’t. He just kept standing there, looking at the cups.

"What’s that supposed to mean?" Cheng Ke clicked his tongue. "I didn’t know they were couple mugs. If you don’t like it, I’ll change the cups."

"That’s not what I meant. I was just saying it casually." Jiang Yuduo said.

Cheng Ke ignored him, went to get the cup he usually drank from, and poured the tea and tea bag from one of the mugs into it.

Jiang Yuduo sighed. "What I was trying to say was… back then, I wore matching couple T-shirts with Chen Qing."

"What?" Cheng Ke turned around in shock. "Couple T-shirts? The kind with one men’s version and one women’s version?"

"What, do they have two men’s versions too?" Jiang Yuduo also turned around in shock. Then after thinking about it, he suddenly looked enlightened. "Yeah, I guess they probably do. And maybe two women’s versions too… after all…"

"No," Cheng Ke quickly grabbed the main point. "Why the hell were you two wearing couple T-shirts?"

"It wasn’t like we wanted to wear them. There was a supermarket behind the place I lived, and when it opened they had a lottery. Third prize was a T-shirt, and I won one."

"…Nice luck. I usually only win tissues," Cheng Ke said.

"You rich young masters even do lotteries?" Jiang Yuduo looked at him.

"My mom would enter sometimes if she happened to be there. If I was around, she’d make me do it," Cheng Ke said. "Usually if there wasn’t a prize for everyone, I wouldn’t win. If there was, I’d win the worst one."

Jiang Yuduo laughed. "Then you count as a veteran when it comes to bad luck. Getting kicked out of the family grand prize already…"

Halfway through, he stopped and cleared his throat, not continuing.

"So was Chen Qing wearing the women’s T-shirt?" Cheng Ke tried the temperature of the cup with his hand. The instructions said to add the milk packet when the water was at 80 degrees… but now he had no idea what temperature it was.

"Yeah, he was skinny, and the women’s size was smaller. I couldn’t wear it. Actually, back then I wanted to wear the women’s one too. The men’s shirt had a cartoon little girl on the front, it was especially stupid. The women’s one had a little boy," Jiang Yuduo said, and laughed again. "Good thing I didn’t wear it."

"Why?" Cheng Ke asked.

"There were letters printed on the back, plus an arrow," Jiang Yuduo said, laughing so hard he could barely get the words out. "Chen Qing wore it for like two months before he realized it said, ‘This is my boyfriend.’ If he stood next to a guy, the arrow on the back pointed right at him, my boyfriend. Anyone who didn’t know would definitely say that idiot was a pervert…"

Cheng Ke looked at him and said nothing.

Jiang Yuduo laughed to himself for a while longer before suddenly stopping.

"Go out and wait." Cheng Ke said.

"…I wasn’t talking about you." Jiang Yuduo said.

"You fucking dare!" Cheng Ke said. "Get out and wait!"

Jiang Yuduo clicked his tongue and turned back into the living room.

Cheng Ke kept staring at the cups.

Two illiterates. They couldn’t even read such simple English.

Because he really had no confidence in his cooking, Cheng Ke insisted on following the milk tea instructions exactly. If it said 80 degrees, then it had to be 80 degrees. He was afraid that if the temperature was off, the milk tea would taste wrong.

But now he couldn’t tell the temperature by hand. After hesitating, he went to the living room, opened the small drawer under the coffee table, and rummaged around.

"What are you looking for?" Jiang Yuduo was leaning back on the sofa, playing on his phone. "Is the milk tea ready?"

"No." Cheng Ke found a thermometer in the drawer. "I’m checking the temperature first."

"You have a fever?" Jiang Yuduo asked.

"No." Cheng Ke took the thermometer and headed to the kitchen. "The instructions said to add the milk packet when the water temperature is 80 degrees."

"80 degrees?" Jiang Yuduo asked again.

"Yeah." Cheng Ke went into the kitchen, planning to disinfect the thermometer first.

"Young master," Jiang Yuduo followed and leaned against the kitchen door. "Have you ever used a thermometer?"

"Yeah," Cheng Ke said. "I’ve used an electronic one. Never one like this. A mercury one should be more accurate, right?"

"There’s no 80 degrees on that thing," Jiang Yuduo sighed. "Who the hell has a fever high enough to reach 80 degrees? Are you drinking yourself stupid?"

Cheng Ke reacted instantly.

That was extremely embarrassing.

To save face, he made one last desperate struggle and held up the thermometer to look closely. "Damn, 42 degrees."

Jiang Yuduo walked over and touched the cup with his hand. "Now it’s 80 degrees."

"You can tell that by touch?" Cheng Ke asked.

"No." Jiang Yuduo picked up the milk packet, tore it open, and poured it into the cup.

"If you can’t tell, why the hell are you saying it’s 80 degrees?" Cheng Ke immediately got anxious watching him. "You… what if it’s not 80 degrees and it tastes bad!"

"I say it’s 80 degrees, then it’s 80 degrees." Jiang Yuduo poured the milk powder from the packet into the cup, quickly grabbed the other packet, tore it open and poured that in too, then stirred it with a spoon. "When I want to drink it, it’s 80 degrees."

"Fine." Cheng Ke picked up the cup and took a sip. "Hey, this is pretty good."

"Yeah." Jiang Yuduo raised his cup at him.

Cheng Ke clinked cups with him, and they both took a sip. Jiang Yuduo wiped his mouth. "Pretty good. Better than some of the shops."

"Mm." Cheng Ke nodded.

There had been a lot of drinking today. Even though he wasn’t drunk, he was still pretty dizzy. Earlier, Jiang Yuduo had scared him awake on the street, and now that he’d had the hot milk tea, he was getting sleepy again.

"You really not sleeping tonight?" Cheng Ke asked.

"Mm," Jiang Yuduo said. "If you’re sleepy, go to sleep."

"Then you…" Cheng Ke thought for a moment. "Should I still bring out the bedding for you? In case you suddenly want to sleep again. Even if you don’t sleep, you can lie down for a bit."

"No need." Jiang Yuduo refused very simply.

"Alright, whatever." Cheng Ke was steamed by the warmth of the milk tea until he was so sleepy he could barely keep his eyes open.

He didn’t bother with Jiang Yuduo anymore. He took a shower and went into the bedroom.

"Don’t close the door." Jiang Yuduo said from the living room sofa while playing on his phone.

Cheng Ke hesitated, then let go of the hand already about to close the door.

After lying down on the bed, he thought about it and sat back up, looking at Jiang Yuduo on the living room sofa. "If you get hungry, there’s food in the fridge."

"Go to sleep," Jiang Yuduo said without looking up from his phone. "You still have the nerve to worry about other people."

"Good night." Cheng Ke sighed and lay back down.

Jiang Yuduo glanced into the bedroom and said softly, "Good night."

Seeing Cheng Ke turn over to face the balcony, he stood up, turned off the living room light, and walked to the window.

The curtains in Cheng Ke’s place were usually open. If he didn’t turn off the lights, Jiang Yuduo couldn’t see down. It was more than ten stories high, and if he wanted to see the street below, he’d have to lean his head out. With the lights on, it would be too obvious.

But by now, the sound of the engine downstairs had already disappeared, just after Cheng Ke had lain down.

When Cheng Ke had been chattering earlier, the engine had kept running. Jiang Yuduo had wanted to listen carefully and judge the distance and position, but because Cheng Ke wouldn’t shut up, he hadn’t been able to.

Now there was no one and no car downstairs.

Jiang Yuduo stood at the windowsill and looked for a while longer. The old north wind at this height was blowing hard enough that he couldn’t quite take it, so he retreated back inside and closed the window properly.

Actually, he was a little sleepy now, but he knew very well that if he lay down, he still wouldn’t be able to sleep.

When that car came out of the turn, its headlights were on. In weather like this, driving through the city with the high beams on was practically a loud announcement that I’m here to crash into someone.

The only thing Jiang Yuduo still couldn’t determine was who the car was meant to hit.

Him, or Cheng Ke.

If the target was him, then staying at Cheng Ke’s place would also bring trouble to Cheng Ke. But if the target was Cheng Ke… he didn’t believe anyone could understand an opponent better than he did when Cheng Ke was really in danger.

Jiang Yuduo rubbed his face.

Staying here was the best option.

He just couldn’t say any of this to Cheng Ke anymore. He wouldn’t say anything related to it to Cheng Ke ever again. Cheng Ke wasn’t like Chen Qing. Cheng Ke didn’t trust him about these things.

Time passed quickly when you were used to getting through it in a certain way.

Like now.

Jiang Yuduo sat on the sofa. He didn’t play on his phone, and he didn’t watch TV. He just sat there in the dark, listening to the sounds around him.

He could hear horns from a street far away, could hear someone singing in another building behind him, and when it was quieter he could even hear snow falling onto the windowsill.

Searching for safety and danger in all those sounds.

Time almost no longer existed.

It wasn’t until he heard the sound of someone stepping on snow downstairs by the balcony that Jiang Yuduo moved. He glanced at the time on his phone. It was three fifty-five.

He stood up and walked very softly into the bedroom.

If Cheng Ke still hadn’t fallen asleep by now, there was no way he could have noticed Jiang Yuduo coming in. To be exact, even if he hadn’t fallen asleep, if his eyes weren’t open, he still wouldn’t have noticed Jiang Yuduo entering.

Jiang Yuduo’s steps were so quiet they made no sound at all, and the wooden floor in the room sometimes creaked when stepped on, but Jiang Yuduo walked all the way to his side and the floor never made a single noise.

His breathing was also so light it couldn’t be heard.

Cheng Ke couldn’t help thinking of a lot of ghost movies…

No, no, no. Jiang Yuduo had often come to this apartment before. With that habit of his, so unusually careful it bordered on abnormal, he should know where to step to avoid making noise.

Cheng Ke was a little tense. In the dark, he stared at Jiang Yuduo’s silhouette and wondered which side he should roll off the bed from if he suddenly got beaten up.

Jiang Yuduo didn’t stop by the bed. He kept walking to the sliding door leading to the balcony, opened it lightly and steadily, then quickly slipped out and closed it behind him.

Cheng Ke frowned. The balcony was enclosed and had a heater, but it was still much colder than the room. He didn’t know what Jiang Yuduo was doing running out there.

But once Jiang Yuduo stood on the balcony, he just faced the dark night outside and didn’t move anymore.

Cheng Ke didn’t dare make a sound either, so he stayed in the dark, looking at his motionless back.

Cheng Ke glanced at the alarm clock by the bed. Twenty minutes had already passed. His eyes felt like they were about to go blind, and he was so sleepy he was almost crying, but Jiang Yuduo was still standing there, so he didn’t dare sleep, afraid something unexpected might happen.

Not only was he worried Jiang Yuduo might beat him up, he was also worried about whether Jiang Yuduo was going to… jump off the building?

He kept staring like that, and for a few moments he even vaguely felt as if Jiang Yuduo had already left his body, leaving only an empty shell behind.

If only there were just an empty shell left… then could he go over and touch it, kiss it, safely?

Forget it. If it was only an empty shell, that wouldn’t be very interesting. Better to custom-make a doll…

Cheng Ke didn’t know when he fell asleep, but when he woke up again, it was still dark outside. Seeing the black silhouette on the balcony, he jumped in fright. His heart thudded so hard it almost shoved his tongue out.

When he remembered that the dark shape should have been Jiang Yuduo, he was stunned.

The little alarm clock by the bed showed the time. It was 4:45 a.m.

And if he remembered correctly, Jiang Yuduo’s position and posture were almost the same as when he had fallen asleep.

All the dizziness in his body had vanished by now. He was completely awake.

Jiang Yuduo had been standing on the balcony for nearly two hours!

Even if he hadn’t planned to jump off the building, the balcony temperature alone would be enough to give a guy wearing only a long-sleeved T-shirt a fever or a cold or something.

Cheng Ke really couldn’t hold on anymore, so he sat up.

When he got out of bed, in order not to scare Jiang Yuduo and start a fight, he coughed once before standing up. When he picked up his pajamas, he shivered before putting them on. Even opening the balcony door was done very slowly, and only after letting the sliding door make noise for long enough did he walk out.

"Did you wake up because you needed to piss?" Jiang Yuduo asked.

Cheng Ke finally let out a breath. He was speaking, and he had spoken first.

"No, I just woke up in the middle of the night and saw someone on the balcony," he shrank his neck in. The balcony temperature was much lower than he had expected. He clutched the collar of his pajamas. "If you want to smoke, just smoke inside. It’s fine."

"I wasn’t smoking." Jiang Yuduo said.

"Come inside, it’s fucking cold," Cheng Ke walked up behind him. "How long have you been standing here?"

"Less than two hours, I guess." Jiang Yuduo answered.

Cheng Ke was a little surprised that he could judge time so accurately in this state.

"Aren’t you cold?" Cheng Ke asked again.

"It’s alright," Jiang Yuduo said. "Go back to sleep."

Cheng Ke stood there without moving. He had originally decided not to keep digging into what was wrong with Jiang Yuduo. Anyway, there were too many things in his life he had chosen to ignore and not think too much about.

But now, at this very moment, he really couldn’t help it. Standing behind Jiang Yuduo, he asked, "Was there someone downstairs?"

Jiang Yuduo slightly turned his head.

"Was it them?" Cheng Ke asked again. The cold wind blowing in through the half-unsealed window frame made him shiver a little.

Jiang Yuduo seemed a little surprised and turned back to look at him. "Did you hear anything?"

"…No." Cheng Ke answered honestly.

"Oh." Jiang Yuduo responded and turned back to keep looking outside. "I’m just standing here for a bit. Don’t worry about me. I’m used to it. Standing here until tomorrow night wouldn’t feel like much."

Cheng Ke didn’t say anything, but he was rapidly piecing things together from Jiang Yuduo’s perspective.

Actually, it was easy to sort out.

If Jiang Yuduo thought "they" were outside, and the target was himself, then with Jiang Yuduo’s personality he would not have stayed here overnight tonight.

The reason he stayed here overnight and spent two hours standing like this was that he thought the young master sleeping in the room was in danger.

Just like how he had once made Da Bin and the others follow him home.

Whether this made sense or not, whether he had something wrong with his head or not.

Jiang Yuduo was protecting him.

Cheng Ke looked at Jiang Yuduo’s back, and he couldn’t describe what he felt.

He only felt himself trembling hard.

His heart was trembling so much that his hands started shaking too.

…It was also possible that he was just cold.

Cheng Ke raised his arms, trembling so badly it felt like he might start shaking any second, and it took him about thirty seconds before he finally wrapped his arms around Jiang Yuduo from behind.

Jiang Yuduo’s body stiffened violently. He turned his head, and after a long while he finally made a sound. "Mm?"

"I don’t know exactly what’s going on," Cheng Ke said softly against the back of his neck. "But in all the years I’ve been alive, this is the first time someone’s stood guard for me in the cold without sleeping."

Jiang Yuduo said nothing.

"I don’t know how to say it," Cheng Ke frowned. It was hard to get the words out. "No one has ever been this… concerned about me."

"Then you," Jiang Yuduo paused, "have really had a rough time."

"…Get lost!" Cheng Ke immediately felt all his emotion turn into dust. "If you don’t know how to talk, just shut up. How high is your emotional intelligence, anyway?"