SA | Chapter 21
by _squisheeZhang Li Comes Out
After the bear incident, Gu Deng gradually understood Zhang Li’s indifferent attitude towards the fawn. Humans have lived in greenhouses for too long, forgetting the dangers and cruelty of the wild.
Initially, Zhang Li didn’t want to rescue the fawn, not because he lacked compassion, but because his indifference was a form of self-protection. It’s like doctors facing life and death, needing to put away excess empathy to continue working.
It’s unknown how many sleepless nights Zhang Li experienced from the first time he saw a corpse to now respecting the laws of nature.
After talking with Zhang Li, Gu Deng barely adjusted his mood. Ali wasn’t so lucky; she came back that night with a fever and was delirious all night.
The next day, when Gu Deng went to see her, Ali lay in a heavy little bed, holding a palm-sized wooden doll, looking pitiful.
Judy took leave to care for Ali at home. Seeing Gu Deng, she whispered that Ali hadn’t woken up yet, so Gu Deng left. By evening, Ali finally got up to eat but soon started crying again.
Judy explained to Gu Deng, “She has a band performance tonight, but now it has to be canceled.”
Ali, holding the wooden doll, pouted, “But I want to go.”
“But you can’t sing even if you go,” Judy wiped her tears and said, “Do you want everyone to hear this voice?”
Her voice was hoarse from the fever, and she wasn’t in good spirits, unable to finish a song. Realizing this, Ali pouted again, “But fans came from out of town today, and they notified us a week in advance on Instagram.”
“There’s nothing we can do; life always has unexpected events.” Judy sighed and suggested, “I’ll call the store and say tonight’s performance is canceled.”
Ali pursed her lips, silently wiping her tears with the back of her hand.
Gu Deng was silent for a while and asked Ali, “Do you have to go?”
Ali mumbled, “Our band doesn’t have many fans. It’s rare for someone to come, so of course, I want to go.”
Gu Deng asked again, “Would you mind having two lead singers?”
Ali blinked, “What do you mean?”
“I can go on stage with you,” Gu Deng said, “We’ll finish the performance together.”
“Really?” Ali’s eyes widened immediately.
Gu Deng said, “If you don’t mind.”
“Of course, I don’t mind! This is great!” Ali shouted hoarsely for her mom to tell the band members there would be an extra person tonight.
In his early years, Gu Deng had done a lot of last-minute gigs. Although he stopped doing such things after becoming famous, he didn’t see any problem with it. However, since this was Ali’s show, he didn’t plan to show his face and wore a wooden mask to blend in with the band.
As Ali said, there were slightly more listeners tonight, but only about a dozen more than usual. The band members explained outside that Ali was unwell, while Gu Deng learned the songs he would use backstage and helped them arrange a new song.
The band’s composer recognized Gu Deng and excitedly asked after hearing the arrangement, “Can we put your name on it?”
Gu Deng hesitated for a moment and said, “Write it as ‘Good’.”
With Gu Deng’s addition, the band members were noticeably excited. Ali, holding her little electric guitar, coughed and played a series of small tremolos. Gu Deng tried the instrument in his hand, feeling a long-lost excitement.
.
In the Alaskan wilderness, Zhang Li was traversing the snowy plains alone. He had just finished dealing with a pack of Arctic wolves, taking a detour that consumed a lot of energy. Fortunately, he was now out of the wolves’ encirclement.
Zhang Li put down his backpack to rest for a moment when suddenly, the satellite phone on his chest rang.
“Zhang Li, are you available now?” Gu Deng’s energetic voice came through.
“I am. I was about to rest. What’s up?”
“I want you to hear something.” Gu Deng said mysteriously, thinking he was speaking quietly, but the bar was loud, so it was actually very loud.
The tension from the wolf threat eased, and Zhang Li smiled, agreeing and putting the phone to his ear.
This was an experience Zhang Li had never had before. Standing on the eternal plains, with muddy snow underfoot and reindeer migrating slowly in the distance, he heard singing in his ear.
The song was originally Ali’s, but Gu Deng infused it with his unique touch, transmitting it through the phone to him.
Zhang Li stood still, quietly listening to the entire song.
“How was it?” Amidst the applause, Gu Deng asked Zhang Li, breathless, with a hint of laughter in his voice.
“It was beautiful,” Zhang Li said. “I’m glad you called and let me hear your singing here.”
Gu Deng, greatly encouraged, sang a second song, then a third… Ali couldn’t hold on and left midway, while Gu Deng, wearing her little electric guitar, seamlessly continued.
Judy recorded a video for him. Gu Deng, wearing a mask and dressed in strange ethnic clothing, looked like he was having a lot of fun.
After the performance, Gu Deng received the video and sighed after watching it. Unfortunately, Zhang Li didn’t have internet, so he couldn’t see the video of him singing. But it didn’t matter; they were going to meet soon!
Gu Deng had gained some popularity online, but he paid no attention to it, having already packed his bags, with his heart set on the Alaskan wilderness.
Even though he hadn’t been gone long, Gu Deng already felt a sense of nostalgia. He leaned against the glass, watching the signal smoke Zhang Li had lit, then glanced back at his luggage.
Strange, was this how he had packed his luggage before? Never mind, maybe it got jostled on the way.
Looking back again, Gu Deng could already see Zhang Li’s figure. Smith parked the helicopter nearby, opened his arms, and naturally hugged Zhang Li in greeting.
Gu Deng stood aside, feeling a bit excited but also a bit awkward from the separation. While he hesitated, Zhang Li let go of Smith and pulled him into a hug. Gu Deng’s cheek rested against Zhang Li’s collarbone, inhaling his pleasant scent.
This hug lasted longer than Smith’s, but neither said to let go. Until Gu Deng opened his eyes, seeing a blurred figure flash past the plane, he curiously looked up.
“What’s wrong?” Zhang Li asked.
Gu Deng looked again but saw nothing. He shook his head and distanced himself, “Nothing, maybe I was seeing things.”
Smith took supplies from the plane for Zhang Li and put away the now-unused skis.
Looking at the backpack on Gu Deng’s back, Zhang Li asked, “You’re not leaving?”
Gu Deng nodded, “I arranged for a small plane to pick me up in three days.”
Zhang Li looked at him, “Aren’t you tired?”
“Who says I’m not? I’m exhausted,” Gu Deng opened up, quickly complaining, “You have no idea how much my calves hurt. I didn’t dare touch them for five days after returning.”
Zhang Li was considerate, “I’ll massage them for you every day from now on.”
Gu Deng was satisfied, “That’s more like it!”
Smith stayed for quite a while, not only delivering supplies but also allowing Zhang Li time to recharge. They even brought a Starlink so Zhang Li could access the internet.
Two hours later, a buzzing sound came from above as Smith piloted the helicopter into the air. Gu Deng put on his backpack, tightened the waist belt and straps.
Seeing Zhang Li not moving, he reminded, “I’m ready, let’s go.”
But Zhang Li shook his head, reaching out to shield him behind.
Gu Deng asked, “What’s wrong?”
“Shh,” Zhang Li put a finger to his lips, pointing to a rock nearby, “There’s something there.”
A bear? Or an Arctic wolf pack?
Gu Deng was a bit nervous, cautiously following Zhang Li to the back. But when they got there, they saw nothing.
Could the animal be that smart? Playing hide and seek with them? Gu Deng glanced at Zhang Li, unsure.
Zhang Li put down his backpack, took out an ice axe, and walked straight towards the rock.
“Ah—” A scream came from behind the rock, revealing Zhang Li had grabbed something by the neck.
“Ali?” Gu Deng was incredulous, almost thinking he was hallucinating, “What are you doing here?”
Ali hung her head, her tone still defiant, “I came with you guys.”
Security check? How did such a big kid go unnoticed? No, this time they departed from a private airport with free takeoffs and landings, so there was no security check.
Gu Deng asked, “Does your dad know?”
Ali didn’t speak, just buried her head lower.
Gu Deng was getting a headache and asked Zhang Li, “What do we do?”
Zhang Li had already taken out his phone, “I’ll call Smith.”
But Ali suddenly screamed, like a nimble monkey grabbing Zhang Li’s arm, “Don’t call! Please, don’t call my dad! I’m begging you!!”
Ali was actually quite likable, though occasionally a bit offbeat, she was lively and polite, without the annoying traits of typical bratty kids. But this time, she had really gone too far. Gu Deng rubbed his forehead, feeling a headache coming on.
Zhang Li, however, remained calm, bargaining with Ali, “Then promise not to run around.”
“I promise!” Ali said immediately, and Zhang Li indeed hung up the call.
Gu Deng couldn’t believe it, whispering to Zhang Li, “You’re just giving up like that?”
Zhang Li shook his head, “Smith doesn’t use his phone while flying.”
The call couldn’t go through in the first place; pretending to call was just a way to make the kid behave.
Gu Deng: “…”
Five minutes later, the three of them sat on three stones, forming a triangle, looking at each other.
Ali, pretending to be serious, put on her backpack, tightened her shoelaces, and looked up at the two adults, “I’m ready.”
Gu Deng didn’t move, and Zhang Li remained silent.
Ali asked again, “Why aren’t you guys moving?”
Zhang Li asked her, “Why did you come here?”
Ali opened her mouth to answer but swallowed her words when she saw Zhang Li’s expression. So fierce, she was a bit scared of this Zhang Li.
Ali walked over to Gu Deng, hugging his arm and calling him uncle.
Gu Deng softened his tone, “Why did you sneak here?”
“No reason,” Ali’s face showed a hint of unease, “Just came to play.”
At this age, kids haven’t learned to manage their expressions, their whole body screaming ‘I’m lying, I’m guilty.’ But pressing too hard might trigger a stress response, so Gu Deng chatted with her, “Then why didn’t you ask your mom and dad to take you out?”
Ali: “I’m still in school, my dad wouldn’t agree.”
Gu Deng: “Can’t you go out during the holidays?”
“No,” Ali said, “I have to go now.”
“Why?”
Ali fell silent again, focusing on kicking the dirt to distract herself.
Words weren’t coming out, so Gu Deng asked Zhang Li if he could contact anyone. Zhang Li shook his head; Smith still wasn’t answering.
Gu Deng asked if they should contact Judy, as she might have noticed the child was missing. Zhang Li called Judy, then came back to tell Gu Deng that Judy would come over herself, estimating they’d have to wait four to five hours.
What was supposed to be an exciting trip was unexpectedly interrupted by an incident.
Gu Deng wasn’t angry, just surprised that a six-year-old like Ali could pull off such a daring stunt. At six, he was so timid he didn’t dare go to the neighborhood gate alone.
The two adults rested in place, and Ali finally sensed something was wrong, looking wary, “Are you waiting for my parents to come?”
“Yes,” Zhang Li said.
Gu Deng: “…”
He had intended to come up with an excuse to make the child less resistant.
Ali was indeed angry, turning to leave with her backpack, only to be grabbed by Zhang Li by the neck again.
“Ahhh, let me go!”
Zhang Li moved her aside without mercy, “Wait.”
Ali’s feet hit the ground, and she ducked under his arm again. But this time, Zhang Li didn’t chase her. Ali found it strange halfway through her run and looked back.
Zhang Li: “Not leaving?”
“Who said I’m not leaving?” Ali pulled a small face, saying fiercely, “Even without you, I can go by myself.”
“Alright.” Zhang Li said simply, really not caring anymore.
Ali: “…?”
With the adults’ attitude, Ali didn’t know what to do. She wasn’t completely clueless about the dangers of the wild.
“Didn’t your dad tell you? There are brown bears and Arctic wolves everywhere here,” Zhang Li said in a flat tone, “and golden eagles. Do you know how they hunt?”
Ali didn’t dare respond.
Zhang Li continued, “Golden eagles like to hunt small mammals. They drive their prey until it’s exhausted before attacking. Their talons are strong, so they like to grab their prey into the air, drop it to the ground to stun it, and then dismember it.”
Ali stood frozen in terror.
Just then, an eagle cry came from the sky, and Ali screamed, quickly running back.
She was still a child, instinctively seeking adult protection when faced with danger. But she was also scared of what Zhang Li had said, turning to Gu Deng for comfort.
Gu Deng patted Ali’s head, a bit speechless, “Did you have to scare her like that?”
Zhang Li: “I was just stating facts.”
Another eagle cry came from the sky, and Ali shivered in fear. Gu Deng patted her head, looking up at the sky.
“Not a golden eagle,” Zhang Li said, “This call is from a red-tailed hawk.”
“Red-tailed hawk?” Gu Deng looked up, but the distance was too far to see anything.
Zhang Li took out a camera to birdwatch, snapping a bunch of photos and handing them to Gu Deng.
With Zhang Li’s explanation, Gu Deng learned that the impressive eagle calls in TV shows, even the sounds of phoenixes and mythical birds, were dubbed by red-tailed hawks. Golden eagles’ calls are more like those of passerines, similar to chirping sounds.
“This is all so confusing!” Gu Deng thought of the white-headed eagle calls he heard by the sea last time and couldn’t help but laugh.
Zhang Li then asked Gu Deng to guess which of the following cat family animals couldn’t roar: tiger, lion, clouded leopard, snow leopard, jaguar, Sunda clouded leopard.
Gu Deng didn’t have this kind of zoological knowledge, but Ali was intrigued, popping her head out to answer, “I know! It’s the clouded leopard and snow leopard!”
Gu Deng looked at her in surprise, and encouraged by his gaze, Ali added, “Clouded leopards and snow leopards don’t roar; they purr like cats~ meow meow meow~ chirp chirp chirp~~”
In the end, Ali even imitated various animal sounds, so cute that it made people almost forget her rebellious act earlier.
Zhang Li asked, “Do you know how cheetahs call?”
“Like this,” Ali lifted her head, arms back, mouth towards the sky, “Awoo~ Awoo~~”
Gu Deng couldn’t help but laugh.
Zhang Li took the opportunity to chat with Ali about various animals. Ali listened intently, occasionally bursting into giggles. But she was still a child, having hidden in the plane for so long, with emotions running high, and soon her eyelids drooped, leaning against Gu Deng and falling asleep. With some time left, Zhang Li set up a tent, putting Ali in a sleeping bag to rest.
Zhang Li was used to being alone, with a tough exterior that made him hard to approach. But when he bent down to put Ali in the sleeping bag and put a hat on her, he looked gentle and attentive, like someone who would take good care of a wife and kids.
“What do you want to say?” Zhang Li suddenly asked, “You’ve been staring at me for a while.”
Gu Deng felt a bit guilty, shaking his head, “…It’s a bit presumptuous, never mind.”
“Presumptuous about what?” Zhang Li seemed indifferent.
Gu Deng looked at Zhang Li, speaking honestly, “I just think you’re good at taking care of kids, you’d make a good father.”
Zhang Li seemed shocked by this statement, taking several seconds to digest it, then shook his head, “I won’t, I won’t become a father.”
Gu Deng’s breath hitched, his heart in turmoil. He looked away, trying to act normal, “I’m sorry, I didn’t know you…”
“Gu Deng,” Zhang Li looked into his eyes, “because I like men.”
Gu Deng’s heart raced even faster, unsure why he was nervous. Even if Zhang Li liked men, what did that have to do with him?
He looked up at Zhang Li, “Why are you telling me this?”
Zhang Li didn’t speak, just quietly watched Gu Deng until he almost couldn’t take it, then looked away, saying, “No reason, just happened to mention it.”
His tone was calm, as if discussing an insignificant topic.
Gu Deng replied with an “Mm,” unsure how to continue.
Zhang Li: “Does it bother you?”
Gu Deng was taken aback, shaking his head, “No, it’s your freedom.”
Zhang Li said nothing more, and Gu Deng buried his head, outwardly calm but inwardly chaotic.
Two hours later, Judy finally arrived, flying a plane. In Alaska, transportation is inconvenient, and small plane licenses are like car licenses, with a high ownership rate.
Judy was clearly worried, rushing through greetings and diving into the tent. Soon after, cries erupted from the tent, with Ali running out, heading straight for Zhang Li’s arms. Judy followed, looking upset.
Gu Deng asked, “What’s wrong?”
“She won’t leave.” Judy said, trying to take Ali, who squealed in protest.
With the child so resistant, the adults couldn’t force it, softening their tone and patiently reasoning.
Ali was more mature than her peers, communicating almost like an adult. But now, she wouldn’t listen to anything, insisting on staying with Gu Deng and Zhang Li.
Judy tried to be firm, but Ali cried and clung to Zhang Li, soaking his jacket with tears.
“Ali, can you be a little more obedient?” Judy was on the verge of breaking down, reaching for Ali’s arm, only to be shrugged off. She pushed her hair back, eyes red, “You know how busy I am at work. I took two days off because you had a fever, just got back to work, and now Zhang Li calls saying you snuck out.”
Judy took a deep breath, almost losing control, “Skipping school, running away from home, tell me, what do you want?”
Ali said nothing, just cried. Judy put her hands on her hips, walking aside, also crying.
Gu Deng suddenly couldn’t stand it, whether it was the child or the mother, he felt suffocated. He couldn’t pinpoint who was right or wrong, but he couldn’t handle the atmosphere.
“Let’s take a break, talk in 20 minutes.” Zhang Li called for a pause in the conflict.
Ali, holding the wooden doll, hid in the tent. Judy wiped her face, finally calming down, “Sorry, I shouldn’t have lost my temper with her. There’s been so much going on, I couldn’t hold it in.”
Zhang Li didn’t comment, just handed her two chocolates. Judy unwrapped one and put it in her mouth, thanking him.
Finally, it was quiet. Gu Deng unclenched his hands, slowly exhaling, regaining his breath.
“Are you okay?” Zhang Li asked him.
Gu Deng shook his head, speaking honestly, “I can’t stand arguments.”
Zhang Li: “Neither can I.”
Gu Deng was surprised, “You were so calm just now, I thought you…”
Zhang Li: “I don’t like arguments, so I solve the problem.”
Gu Deng agreed with his reasoning.
“Want some?” Zhang Li opened his right hand, revealing two sea salt toffees. These weren’t part of Zhang Li’s supplies, but something Gu Deng bought from a candy store out of craving.
“Yes.” Gu Deng took one, unwrapping it, while Zhang Li took the wrapper and ate the other.
After they finished the candy, Judy composed herself, standing outside the tent to ask Ali if she could come in. Ali opened a small gap, looking aggrieved. Judy apologized, and Ali cried, throwing herself into her arms.
Seeing this, Gu Deng felt a bit envious. Even though they argued, they also apologized and made up.
After a while, Judy came out with Ali, and from their expressions, it seemed they had reconciled.
Gu Deng asked, “Resolved?”
Judy shook her head, saying, “She wants to tell you both.”
Gu Deng was surprised, looking at Ali. Ali, holding the wooden doll, spoke slowly, “I’m sorry for causing trouble.”
The two adults couldn’t hold a grudge against a child, both shaking their heads, saying it was fine.
Ali continued, “I didn’t come to see the reindeer, I wanted to go with you to see my grandma.”
The reindeer’s migration ends at the Arctic Ocean coastal plain, which indeed passes by an Inuit settlement, where Judy’s mother lives.
“Grandma?” Judy was stunned, not expecting this reason. She comforted Ali, “We’ll visit during your summer break, or bring grandma to stay with you.”
Ali shook her head, saying in a panic, “There’s no time.”
Judy: “Why no time?”
Ali: “Because grandma is sick.”
“No,” Judy shook her head, “Mom said she was fine on the phone last week.”
Ali clutched the wooden doll, looking down, “But I dreamed she was sick…”
Hearing this, Gu Deng’s expression changed.
Zhang Li looked up at him, “What’s wrong?”
Gu Deng shook his head, “Nothing.”
He just remembered some old things.
No matter how they asked, Ali kept repeating the same thing. Children have limited energy, and after crying so much, it’s hard to maintain a conversation.
Ultimately, it was someone else’s family matter, so Gu Deng and Zhang Li didn’t intervene. Finally, Judy compromised, saying, “How about this, we’ll visit grandma tonight, stay one night, then go home.”
“Ten days, okay?” Ali bargained, “I’ll stay ten days, then go home.”
“Ali,” Judy’s tone turned serious, “Mom doesn’t have time to stay ten days. Grandma is old and can’t move well, you can’t stay alone.”
Ali was sad for a while, then suddenly looked up, “What about Uncle Good? Uncle Good can stay with me!”
Judy shook her head, “Uncle has his own things, and even if he didn’t, why should he spend ten days with you?”
Ali knew she was asking too much, stammering, “I can pay Uncle.”
Judy: “What can you pay?”
Ali couldn’t say anything, about to cry again.
Gu Deng hesitated, then tried, “I understand Ali’s feelings. If you don’t mind, I can stay with her for a few days.”
Judy felt bad, shaking her head, “No need, we have no reason to ask you. Besides, the customs and environment there are different, you don’t speak the language, it’ll be hard to adapt.”
Gu Deng hadn’t thought of that. His understanding of Inuit people came from high school geography, like living in igloos and eating raw meat, seeming primitive. But Judy and Ali were no different from ordinary people, and being Asian, they even felt more familiar.
Gu Deng understood Ali’s desire to be with her grandmother, but he was also scared of going to an unfamiliar tribe, so he stayed quiet.
Ali realized her hopes were dashed, she didn’t cry out loud, but tears kept falling. A noisy child is annoying, but a quietly crying child can evoke sympathy.
Judy felt bad, softly comforting Ali. Ali couldn’t hold back anymore, crying until she almost passed out.
“I can go.” Quietly, Zhang Li spoke up.
Ali was already crying too hard to hear, but Judy looked at Zhang Li. She didn’t trust Gu Deng to go, but had no doubts about Zhang Li.
She and Smith loved nature, with many experiences in hiking and cross-country skiing. Considering work and their upcoming child, they decided to sail across Alaska for their honeymoon.
They prepared food, transportation, and communication, but overlooked the mosquito army.
Alaska is a high-latitude area, and those not from there rarely associate it with mosquitoes. But in summer, especially in the Arctic Ocean plains and river delta areas, it’s almost mosquito heaven. Swarms of mosquitoes blanket the plains, not sparing any blood-bearing animal.
North American reindeer migrate south in summer mainly to escape mosquito attacks. In just one day, mosquitoes can suck 300ml of blood from a reindeer, with many dying from mosquito attacks.
Judy and Smith knew nothing about this, entering the river delta area without any mosquito protection. Mosquitoes filled the sky, like dark clouds swirling endlessly.
Mosquitoes didn’t spare any exposed skin, crawling into ears and noses, almost blocking their breathing. Judy and Smith were itchy, in pain, unable to endure even a moment.
In despair, a photographer appeared in the delta, giving them mosquito repellent and netting, leaving without even a name. That was their first encounter with Zhang Li.
They met again in Judy’s hometown, the Inuit settlement.
Judy grew up in the city with her mother, living an ordinary life. Until Judy became an adult, her mother suddenly moved back to the tribe alone. Judy stayed in the city, occasionally visiting.
This was her first visit after marriage, hearing someone in the village needed a translator, not expecting it to be Zhang Li. But she only translated once, as Zhang Li learned Inuit the next year.
Judy and Smith loved nature, but life’s demands meant compromises, making them envy Zhang Li’s freedom and experiences.
However, Zhang Li didn’t stay in Alaska permanently, only visiting occasionally for filming. Though he came more frequently in recent years, he hadn’t settled down, buying a small plane and modified pickup, mostly stored with them, used as transportation.
Knowing each other for nearly a decade, as their best friend, Judy naturally trusted Zhang Li’s abilities and character, but…
Judy asked, “Aren’t you filming the reindeer migration?”
Zhang Li just shook his head, saying it was fine.
Gu Deng glanced at Zhang Li, puzzled but relieved.
Ali finally got her wish to reunite with her grandmother, eagerly introducing them on the way to the village, saying the wooden doll was hand-carved by her grandmother, bringing health and luck. No wonder Ali clung to it when she had a fever.
The small plane flew low over Alaska, the land frozen, a barren scene. Gradually, signs of a village appeared in the snowy wilderness.
Gu Deng pressed against the glass, watching as the plane circled above, then landed on flat ground. He got off the plane, excitedly and curiously observing everything around.
The houses were low and small, not the traditional igloos described in geography books, but more modern prefab houses with slanted steel roofs. Nearby, a rack held a row of dark brown walrus jerky, hinting at the local lifestyle.
Whether it was too cold or the population was small, the village outskirts were empty. As they walked into the village, there was finally some activity.
There weren’t many villagers, mostly middle-aged and elderly, with few children in sight. These people were short, with stocky limbs, some recognizing Judy and Ali, guiding them to a house.
Someone was working by the roadside, surprisingly wearing an apron. Gu Deng blinked hard, unable to believe what he saw.
In Alaska, the Arctic, an Inuit settlement, someone was wearing an apron like those worn by Chinese rural aunties, with familiar styles and colors, possibly even imported from China!
It was so strange, yet amidst the strangeness, Gu Deng felt a vague warmth. Sichuan aunties and Inuit people, separated by thousands of kilometers, would never meet, yet were connected by an apron. The world is truly amazing.
The village was small, and before Gu Deng realized it, they had reached a building resembling a yurt.
Thick fur covered the cylindrical building, with a conical roof, one of the few traditional structures in the village.
Their guide, a middle-aged woman with facial tattoos, spoke to Judy in a language Gu Deng didn’t understand, but for some reason, Judy and Ali didn’t look happy.
The woman left at the door, and Judy lifted the heavy curtain, leading Ali inside. Gu Deng looked at Zhang Li, unsure if he should enter, until Zhang Li nodded, and he followed inside.
The first impression was darkness, until he removed his sunglasses and finally saw everything around. The room was small, filled with textiles and animal products. An elderly woman sat on a chair, and Gu Deng heard Judy call her mom.
Judy’s mother looked older than expected, her face lined and hair silver, appearing nearly eighty. Gu Deng was shocked but refrained from commenting, standing silently aside.
Judy called her mom again, but there was no response. The woman stared straight ahead, occasionally looking down, curiously at Judy.
Ali called her grandma, holding her hand, saying she was back. The woman spoke unfamiliar words, showing a puzzled expression.
This was nothing like the reunion Gu Deng imagined. He looked at Zhang Li, a sense of foreboding rising.
Judy and Ali’s calls grew urgent, and the dim yurt filled with light as the tattooed woman entered, speaking to Judy. After listening, Judy was stunned, tears suddenly falling.
Ali cried too, clinging to the woman’s knees, inconsolable. The tattooed woman silently wiped her tears, patting Judy’s shoulder before leaving.
Gu Deng didn’t know the details, but he could sense the emotions from their actions and expressions. Red-eyed, he looked at Zhang Li, who took his right hand, leading him away.
They walked until far from the yurt, where no one was around, finally stopping.
Before Gu Deng was a vast white snowfield, with a path leading to the sea. The sea wasn’t frozen, waves washing the shore—this was the Arctic Ocean.
The cold wind blew away his tears, Gu Deng blinked, looking up at Zhang Li, “What happened?”
Zhang Li’s bangs were blown back by the wind, revealing a slightly red nose and pale cheeks. Whether it was Gu Deng’s imagination, Zhang Li seemed a bit sad.
But soon, Zhang Li’s expression returned to calm, saying, “The old woman doesn’t remember them.”
“How could that be?” Gu Deng had expected bad news, but not this bad, “Didn’t Judy say she talked to her mom last week?”
Zhang Li was silent for a moment, saying, “Maybe she was lucid for a short time, so she called her daughter then.”
Gu Deng lowered his eyes, suddenly feeling sad.
Later, they met with Judy, and things were as Zhang Li said. The old woman had Alzheimer’s, only lucid occasionally to call her daughter. The village had poor internet, and Judy was busy with work, completely unaware.
“If it weren’t for Ali insisting on coming, I might have… might have…” Judy covered her face, crying uncontrollably.
Zhang Li patted her shoulder, and Gu Deng turned away, wiping his tears.
That night, they stayed in the village. Judy and Ali stayed with the old woman, while Gu Deng and Zhang Li stayed with the tattooed woman. From her, Gu Deng learned about Judy’s mother’s past.
The old woman was named Carly, a name she gave herself after learning English, meaning freedom. Carly was young during Alaska’s cultural modernization.
Traditional languages, customs, and religions were retreating under modern influences, most natives assimilated, losing their culture and language. Only a few extreme conservatives moved to even more isolated places, holding their ground.
Gu Deng finally understood why the village seemed so modern, almost indistinguishable from outside villages.
For a long time, Carly’s generation was torn between two cultures, broken, self-doubting, unable to find value. She once left Alaska, becoming a hippie, wandering, numbing herself with music and alcohol.
Later, she had Judy, an unexpected birth that made her chaotic life busier but also brought something else.
Carly settled down with Judy, working, living, learning, becoming an ordinary single mother in the city. By then, Carly had fully integrated into the city, with no trace of her minority heritage. Until Judy became an adult, Carly suddenly chose to return to the village.
Judy, raised in the city, was fully westernized in culture and habits, naturally unable to follow her mother. She tried to dissuade her to no avail, maintaining phone contact. Ali, however, was raised by Carly before school, fitting in better here.
After hearing the story, Gu Deng was silent for a long time. His feelings were complex, unable to make a proper comment. They were individuals, yet marked by the times.
Gu Deng thought of himself, how much of his journey was his own principles, and how much was external influence?
Gu Deng had insomnia again, taking two sleeping pills before finally sleeping in the early morning.
The next day, they visited Carly, who still didn’t recognize anyone, curiously watching them, smiling innocently. The illness washed away the scars and pain of time, turning her back into a child.
Judy talked to Carly for a while, then turned to see them out. She seemed to have passed the most vulnerable period, pale but with determination in her eyes.
The wind blew fiercely, Judy tucked her hair behind her ear, telling Gu Deng and Zhang Li, “Thank you for coming with me. I’ll stay here for a while; you can stay or leave.”
Gu Deng was fine with either, looking at Zhang Li.
Judy misunderstood, saying, “Zhang Li has a license, he can fly the small plane back.”
Gu Deng asked Zhang Li, “Do you want to leave?”
“I want to stay a few more days,” Zhang Li looked towards the sea, “It’s almost whale hunting season.”