WC ⋆ Chapter 15

Before Qi Lin could ask why, Father Jiang had already walked out of the bedroom. The natural pressure that emanated from an elder left him momentarily speechless, and he immediately grabbed Jiang Yishen and spun him around to face Father Jiang directly.

“Dad.” Jiang Yishen greeted him, then without another word, grabbed Qi Lin’s hand and barged into the apartment.

“Back so suddenly?” Father Jiang was tall and broad-shouldered, his hair cropped very short, the dark stubble of new growth after it had been shaved for surgery, his eyes bright and sharp as they looked over. He seemed to be in good spirits.

He hadn’t thrown a fit the way Jiang Yishen had expected, which made Jiang Yishen even more certain that something was definitely wrong.

Qi Lin was yanked along and nearly stumbled, still replaying the order Jiang Yishen had issued just moments ago in his mind: once we’re inside, don’t say a word, follow my lead, point at what you want and I’ll strike.

So he kept his mouth shut. As they passed Father Jiang, both of them tensed and exchanged a brief glance.

“This is…” Father Jiang asked, uncertain.

“My friend.” Jiang Yishen said, pointing at the nightstand in the bedroom. “Search it!”

That single word landed like a thunderclap, startling both Qi Lin and Father Jiang. Father Jiang instinctively raised his voice: “What are you doing!”

Qi Lin was shaken for a moment, but the loop made him fearless. He quickly weighed the pros and cons in his mind and chose to start rummaging through the cabinet immediately.

Jiang Yishen squeezed in beside him to search, and in a few quick movements pulled out a plastic bag. He opened it to find a thick stack of medical record booklets.

“Jiang Yishen!” Father Jiang seemed to have never seen his own son act this recklessly. “What are you looking for?”

“Dad, sit for a bit.” Jiang Yishen said carelessly, shaking the medical record booklets out onto the floor, scattering a pile of loose slips of paper.

Registration receipts, prescription slips. Qi Lin understood at once and began sorting through the papers scattered on the ground. He quickly found one with the header of a local hospital: “This one!”

Jiang Yishen took it and looked. The date was New Year’s Day, just three days ago. His dad had gone to the hospital on his own without telling him.

Anxiety surged through him. For a moment his heart nearly leapt into his throat, every hair on his body standing on end, cold sweat pouring out in streams. He shot to his feet and turned to look at his dad, who was no longer as tall as him: “What did you go to the hospital for!”

“I went to pick up medication!” His dad’s volume matched his, and he repeated it: “Medication! What did I go for, I went to pick up medication!”

He snatched the registration slip out of Jiang Yishen’s hand and pointed at Qi Lin, who was still crouched on the floor looking through the medical records: “You, you, that little classmate of yours, leave the floor alone, I’ll tidy it up myself. What did you two come here for?”

Qi Lin looked up at him, his finger resting on a hospital admission slip on the floor. Through that thin sheet of paper, the cold of the floor tiles bit into his fingertip like a small snake, the chill traveling through his bones and spreading through his entire body.

“Dad, if you’re feeling unwell somewhere, why didn’t you tell me?” Jiang Yishen’s voice was trembling slightly, his words coming out in a rapid volley. “When I came home on the 29th, you said you were fine everywhere. I asked if your face was still numb and you said it was nothing. Then you turn around and go to the hospital by yourself! What’s wrong with you? Something serious enough to call Mom back!”

“Hey!” Father Jiang couldn’t stand being lectured by his own son, especially when Xu Huaying was dragged into it. His expression changed at once. “There’s nothing wrong with me! Her coming back has nothing to do with me! Why are you shouting?”

“Then what did she come home for just now?” Jiang Yishen pointed toward the door. “Every name card on top of the shoe cabinet is in traditional characters. She left those, didn’t she!”

There was so much more stuck in his chest. The follow-up checkup on New Year’s Day, and today was only the 3rd. In just three days, his mom had specifically flown back. There was no way this was a small matter.

“I told you I’m fine. I just have a bit of dizziness, that’s a normal aftereffect!” Father Jiang’s large palm slapped the table. As he spoke, even his ears turned red with agitation.

Jiang Yishen refused to back down: “You used to endure headaches so bad you were vomiting without saying a word. Whatever could make you bother going to the hospital is not a small thing.”

Qi Lin found it hard to keep listening. This kind of exchange was heartbreaking. This parent-child dynamic was warped yet commonplace, where perfectly natural concern could only be expressed through arguments, where fighting became the bridge between father and son for conveying feelings. Beyond that there was only distance, a sense of propriety, estrangement, and silent giving. No matter how you looked at it, it was love that couldn’t find its way out.

He gathered the medical records back into the plastic bag, stood up, and stepped between the two of them: “Stop arguing. Uncle, please sit down. Let’s talk this through properly.”

This gave Father Jiang a way to step down gracefully. After all, he was the one who wasn’t entirely in the right here, and pushing the argument further would only end badly for everyone.

Father Jiang caught his breath, pulled over a chair and sat down, braced his hands on his knees, and took a long moment to calm down before saying: “I didn’t tell you because you had exams coming up!”

Jiang Yishen’s emotions, which had barely settled, boiled over again: “So what if I miss a set of finals! Can anything be more important than you, you’re what matters most, okay?”

“Don’t take this exam, don’t take that exam, just don’t take any of them!”

“You…” Jiang Yishen was so agitated his eyes reddened, and he was about to stand up when Qi Lin suddenly raised his hand and patted him on the head. A warm palm landed on his hair, then slid down along the strands and came to rest at the back of his neck, giving it a soothing squeeze.

The anger and worry miraculously receded. Jiang Yishen was suddenly flooded with a surge of grievance he couldn’t hold back. He knew Qi Lin was standing behind him, and at once he couldn’t get another word out. He was afraid that if he opened his mouth he would start crying, which would be very immature and very undignified.

Father Jiang saw his son on the verge of tears and couldn’t stay angry anymore. It was as if someone had knocked the fire right out of him, leaving only helplessness: “Hey, I wasn’t criticizing you, you’re just…”

Father Jiang looked toward Qi Lin. Qi Lin understood, and the hand resting at the back of Jiang Yishen’s neck moved forward, rubbing his cheek gently, the way you would coax a small child.

Jiang Yishen was quiet for a moment, then said in a muffled voice: “Isn’t this a bit too intimate?”

Qi Lin said: “It’s fine, we can loop.”

In the silence that had settled over the small apartment, birdsong drifted in from outside the window. The world was so harmonious and still. Jiang Yishen sniffled, bowed his head and thought for a moment, then said: “If you’re not feeling well, tell me. You’re my dad. What is there you can’t say to me? Why are you going to your ex-wife for help? She’s living perfectly well over there…”

Father Jiang had barely been calm for three minutes before this set him ablaze again: “I told you I didn’t go looking for your ex, my ex, your mom!”

“Then why did she come home?”

“Believe it or not!” Father Jiang finally understood. These two had come specifically for this. He slapped his thigh and stood up to usher them out: “Alright, go back to school. We’ll talk after your exams, okay? I really am fine!”

Jiang Yishen stopped being stubborn. He walked to the door, then turned back: “My exam is tomorrow. After it’s done, I’m taking you to the hospital. I need to hear what the doctor says myself.”

He hadn’t needed to say any of this. After all, the loop would reset everything. He could take his dad to the hospital directly after the loop, and Father Jiang wouldn’t remember anything that happened today.

But in this moment he discovered the cruelty of the loop. By the second cycle, the words and emotions of this exchange would be wiped clean. He could speak to his dad in a more measured, more considerate way. But all the impact of his current loss of composure would only ripple out to affect him and Qi Lin.

He couldn’t treat the father standing before him as a complete NPC. No matter how many times the loop ran, the exasperation in it was real, the concern was real, the choices his dad made came entirely from his own heart, and that heart was real too.

Jiang Yishen now understood that his dad felt he owed him something, that he had never stopped feeling guilty about him missing the graduate entrance exams, that he thought of himself as a burden.

Without this loop, he probably wouldn’t have realized any of this so quickly.

“Jiang Yishen.” Qi Lin was calling him.

Jiang Yishen raised his head. The front door of the apartment had already closed behind them. He was standing in the corridor, and Qi Lin still had a firm grip on his wrist.

“After the loop, we’ll take your dad to the hospital. Your mom will probably come too by then, and you can ask everything you need to know.” Qi Lin took his hand and guided it to his zipper. “Pull your jacket closed. Let’s go.”

Jiang Yishen was about to cry again. Right now he very much wanted to kiss Qi Lin.

Qi Lin saw him standing there without moving, sighed, and like someone looking after a small child, guided his fingers to zip up his jacket.

“Baby.” Jiang Yishen called out very softly.

The word made Qi Lin’s hands freeze. He was standing one step higher up, looking at Jiang Yishen at eye level. He stared for a moment, then scrunched up his brow hard and quickly stepped back two paces: “You are not allowed to kiss me. If you do we can’t loop anymore.”

Then he caught himself and added: “We’ve already broken up. Stop being clingy for no reason.”

The sound of a security door opening and closing came from below in the stairwell. It seemed a resident was coming in. Qi Lin snapped back to his senses and led Jiang Yishen downstairs: “Alright, alright. Uncle made it through the surgery under all that pressure. Things can’t be harder now than they were then. Why are you looking so pitiful.”

Jiang Yishen didn’t know either. He only knew that the loop had so many benefits, binding him and Qi Lin together even without a romantic relationship, without having to bear the terrible weight of questions about love, yet still giving them every right to lean on each other.

He didn’t really want time to move forward anymore. Maybe looping on the same day wasn’t so bad after all, as long as they were still here together.

It was a long way back to Qi Lin’s place from here, but fortunately the subway at this hour wasn’t too crowded. They found seats and sat down. Jiang Yishen still had his head drooping listlessly, but at least he wasn’t as wretched as he’d been a moment ago.

Qi Lin nudged him with the tip of his foot: “If you hang your head that low you’ll have neck pain again when you get back.”

Jiang Yishen was unhappy about that: “I’ve only been drooping for five minutes! And I’m drooping because I’m sad.”

“Okay.” Qi Lin wanted to say that his whole point was to comfort him so he wouldn’t be sad, but he felt a bit too embarrassed to say it.

Jiang Yishen waited for what came after “okay,” but nothing came. He clicked his tongue: “You really are something.”

At least he didn’t immediately send a red packet this time. Whether that was cause for relief was unclear.

“What did I do?” Qi Lin was baffled.

Jiang Yishen let out a long sigh: “Do you know the saying, love someone the way you tend a flower?”

Qi Lin understood him this time: “Tend what flower. They’d all be dead. The two of us can only keep a cactus alive.”

Jiang Yishen went quiet. He thought there was something to that, and also something not quite right about it, but he couldn’t figure out exactly what the problem was.

“Let’s go back and check on our cactus.” Qi Lin said suddenly. “Maybe it’ll actually bloom this time. I saw flower buds a couple of days ago.”

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