SMMW | Chapter 5

〖Wen Qing invited you to sit for a while and have some tea pastries. Three plates were set before you.

You choose: First Plate / Second Plate / Third Plate〗

Naturally, the Timid Save-Scumming Immortal made a save just like always.

[You’re saving even for this?]

[This zero-spend run is really suffering]

[…You’re amazing]

[I’m tired, can I just top up for you?]

[This progress is so slow, you could play for a lifetime]

The facts proved that Song Hao’s caution was useful. Through endlessly loading and saving, he tested out that the effects of the three plates of pastries were:

First plate, horseshoe cake, Fatigue -1

Second plate, osmanthus cake, Literary Talent +1

Third plate, poria cake, Fatigue -3

“Resting once lowers Fatigue by 5, so adding Literary Talent is still more worth it.” On his fourth reload, Song Hao ate the osmanthus cake and successfully gained +1 Literary Talent.

He had thought he might be able to pick up some stat gains at the banquet in the front courtyard too, but in the end nothing increased at all. He really had just gone to join in the excitement.

Still, before he left, Wen Qing gave him a food box and said it contained all three kinds of pastries. Choosing to accept it also raised Wen Qing’s favor by two points.

“You get to eat, take food away, and even gain favor. He really is a good person,” Song Hao said, touched.

After returning home, he immediately pulled the pastries out of his inventory and clicked Use. The system prompted, 〖You used Horseshoe Cake x1〗. Other than that, his stats did not change at all. The same was true when he ate the other pastries. Song Hao was hugely disappointed. It looked like stat gains from them could only be collected once.

Continuing the plot, after Yuan Hao reported the good news to his mother, the system popped up the next-stage mission.

〖Mission: Successfully enter the academy

Completion condition: Earn 500 qian in tuition within three days (top three get a 40% discount)〗

〖Action Locations Overview:

Yuan Family: Study / Copy Books / Rest

Back Mountain: Xing’er / Gather Herbs

Market: Bookstore / Apothecary / Food Stall

Wen Family: Wen Qing〗

“Alright, there are more action locations now. Let’s test them one by one first and see what they do.” The Save-Load Immortal rolled up his sleeves, about to go all in. Twenty minutes later, he summarized the results as follows.

[Yuan Family]

Study: Literary Talent +2, Fatigue +2

Copy Books: Obtain Hand-Copied Book x1, Fatigue +2

Rest: Fatigue -5

[Back Mountain]

Xing’er: Xing’er Favor +4, Tongcao x2, Fatigue +2

Gather Herbs: Physique +1, Fatigue +3, Tongcao x3~5, chance to obtain higher-grade medicinal herbs

[Market]

Bookstore: Buy writing materials to increase Literary Talent / consign Hand-Copied Books for sale, price varies

Apothecary: Buy medicine / chat with Yun Ling, the apothecary owner’s daughter / sell herbs, one tongcao sells for 10 qian

Food Stall: Fermented Rice Dumplings, 10, Fatigue -3 / Yangchun Noodles, 20, Literary Talent +2 / Soy-Braised Roast Duck, 50, Fatigue -5, Physique +1 / Osmanthus Wine, 80, Literary Talent +5 / Buddha Jumps Over the Wall, 300 wen, Literary Talent +10, Physique +5

[Wen Family]

Wen Qing: Wen Qing Favor +2, chance to eat pastries, stat gains are mostly Literary Talent increases or Fatigue reduction

“Dropping by Wen Qing’s house gives favor, doesn’t add Fatigue, and randomly raises stats…” Song Hao felt as though he had been purified. In the bloody hands of capital, he had seen an angel. He sincerely sighed, “He’s such a good person.”

[That’s the second time you’ve praised him today]

[Something’s off with you]

[Don’t tell me you’ve fallen for him?]

[Shipped [Heart x1]]

[Hey, this game has female leads, you know]

“Thanks, boss, for the heart~ I’m just commenting a little. Let’s keep analyzing. All the newly added options are tied to money. Copying books and gathering herbs can both earn money, and the market food stall lets you spend money to buy stats.”

Because the stat system had grown more complicated, Song Hao simply opened Excel and made a new spreadsheet. Across the top he wrote the stats, down the side he listed events, then added a row for action count, entered formulas, dragged to copy them down, and finally totaled everything up. It was a full set of熟练社畜 tactics, so practiced it left the comment section emotionally conflicted.

[Are you at work right now???]

[No but bro, no but bro, you…]

[My mom caught me playing on my phone, and I told her I was watching a computer science online class. She believed me and even cut up a plate of fruit and brought it in.]

[head scratch]

[Actually, the first recharge is only 3 yuan and gives 3000 qian]

“First place gets a discount, which means I only need to earn 300 qian within three days. Gathering herbs can refresh, and each time you can get at most 5 stalks, so that’s 50 qian… Xing’er? Not considering Xing’er. If you pick Xing’er, each time you can gather at most only three stalks.”

[Do you still remember this is a harem game?]

[Heartless Dao]

[He won’t even take the beginner-stage heroine]

[Who understands the value of Xing’er’s 4 favorability points]

[The streamer is already immersed in his own penny-pinching art]

Song Hao ignored all of them and kept analyzing.

“Copying books can also make money, but consigning them takes time, and the amount is uncertain. Three days gives a total of nine action slots. Herb gathering can only be done during the day, so we’ll use six of them there.

Right, gathering herbs can also increase Physique. That’s a new stat, so let’s claim it first. One run is 50, six runs makes 300 qian, exactly enough for tuition.

That leaves three nighttime actions. One time copying books to try my luck, one time going to the market to consign the hand-copied book, and one time selling herbs, while also asking Yun Ling around for information.

Let me input the action count and take a look… nice! The Fatigue total comes out to exactly 20. Completely feasible.”

[[applause][applause][applause]]

[Hint: Yun Ling is a romanceable character]

[Absolutely no lust for flirting, only desire for money]

[Immersive work experience]

[I want that spreadsheet [Lollipop x1]]

“Thanks, boss, for the lollipop~ Follow my account, Big Big Big Big White Sweet Potato. I’ll upload clipped stream highlights later, and I’ll put the spreadsheet link in the profile.”

Song Hao confidently started carrying out the plan.

On the first day, he gathered herbs during the day, Tongcao x10, and copied books at night.

Copying books really meant copying books. You had to control the brush inside the designated squares and write the book title. After loudly cursing the officials, Song Hao struggled to control the mouse and tried to keep the strokes from going outside the boxes. The handwriting was ugly, but at least he finished it.

On the second day, he gathered herbs during the day, Tongcao x10, and at night he wandered around the market and also consigned the hand-copied book for sale.

On the third day, he gathered herbs during the day, Tongcao x10, Baiweizi x1. Baiweizi looked like a rare medicinal herb. But before he could go out at night to sell the herbs, his mother called him to her bedside. She still looked weak, but she pulled out a cloth bundle from under her pillow, and inside was 500 qian.

〖“This is the tuition Mother saved up for you. Take it to the academy tomorrow. You must study well, and you need not worry about things at home.”

“Mother…” Yuan Hao’s eyes brimmed with tears, and for a long time he said nothing.〗

“Mom is so good. The tuition’s all taken care of in one go. But I still need to sell the medicinal herbs. I can keep a little aside, though, to see whether they’ll be useful later. Mom, don’t worry, I’ll definitely find Golden Vine Flower and save you!”

Song Hao went to the apothecary, sold 20 stalks of tongcao, and got 200 qian. While chatting with Yun Ling, he discovered that she was urgently buying Baiweizi, at a price of 50 per stalk.

〖Yun Ling: I’ll take however much you have, young master, just bring it all to me.

Yuan Hao: Alright, I’ll definitely keep a close eye out for more.

※ Yun Ling Favor +3〗

“We’ve gotten commercial information. We’re not short on money right now, so we can let her stay anxious for a little longer and see whether the price goes up later.”

[You really are impossible to soften]

[Baiweizi is obviously Yun Ling’s favor gift, alright?]

[Harem game! This is a harem game!]

[She’s already at 3 favor, and the streamer is still thinking about selling it at a higher price]

[Xing’er gives 4 favor at once, so looked at this way, Yun Ling’s tendency to judge by looks is relatively low]

Song Hao then went to the bookstore and found that the book had already sold. The owner said that someone had appreciated his work and paid 500 qian for it.

“Holy shit!!! I’ve struck it rich!!! I’ve got 1200 now!”

[???]

[That’s insane luck, randomly getting such a big spender]

[The most I’ve ever sold one for was 100]

[Jealous]

[This is actually great content]

Song Hao raked a hand through his hair and, looking extremely dashing, paid the tuition on the second day and successfully entered the academy. He also received the set of writing materials and the standard uniform issued by the academy, and the headmaster even specially had his own daughter, Kong Mengxue, deliver a personally inscribed piece of calligraphy to the top five. It could be said that he valued them very highly.

〖New Action Location Added: Academy, Lecture Hall / Myriad Books Pavilion / Martial Practice Ground

Mission: Pass the provincial exam within one year and become a juren

Completion Conditions: Literary Talent > 150, Physique > 30〗

And the number of actions was changed to 3 per month, so one year meant 36 actions. As usual, Song Hao transformed into a save-file master and kept revising that eye-searing Excel sheet of his.

“The Lecture Hall is for attending lectures. It opens once a month and gives a fixed Literary Talent +5 and Fatigue +2. That one’s pretty good, saves me from repeatedly rerolling on my own.

Each visit to the Myriad Books Pavilion costs 100 qian and gives Literary Talent +10, and you can run into the headmaster’s daughter, but 100 is way too expensive, so not considering it.

The Martial Practice Ground gives Physique +2 and Fatigue +4. Cost-performance is not great. If I go gather herbs, I can also get +1 Physique, then use the money from selling herbs to buy roast duck from the food stall, add another +1 Physique, and also reduce Fatigue. Gathering herbs is still better.”

“Calculated like this… 12 times attending lectures, 12 times gathering herbs, and 12 actions left. Literary Talent will still be short by a bit over ten points, but I can just casually read a few times or buy it at the food stall. Good thing I have money. Thanks to my benefactor~”

“Huh? Why does this feel easier than the newbie village? It doesn’t seem that hard this time. I could clear it pretty easily.”

[Because you don’t chase female leads…]

[The officials could rack their brains and still never imagine someone would play like this]

[You don’t like any of the three?]

[Not falling in love really does save money, learned something]

[You’re on the eunuch route, tell the truth]

And that really was it. Song Hao finally realized the thing he had ignored this whole time while playing, female leads. This was a harem game after all!

But… wherever the female leads were, either the stats were poor, or the entry requirements were high. It was still better to drop by Wen Qing’s place and pick up stats.

Song Hao declared, “I can’t even be bothered with girls from some poor backwater. I’m going to be emperor in the future, so no matter what, I should at least marry a minister’s daughter.”

Even though he was acting this cocky right now, he very quickly ran into the academy’s first triggered event, campus bullying, and the one being bullied was Wen Qing.

〖Zou Hui, fifth place in this county-level exam, the prefect of Jinping’s cousin’s nephew, arrogant and conceited, narrow-minded, and secretly in love with Kong Mengxue, the headmaster’s daughter.

Zou Hui ordered his underlings to surround Wen Qing. “Hand over the headmaster’s personal inscription.”

Wen Qing frowned and replied, “You and I both have a personally inscribed piece from the headmaster. Why go so far as this banditry?”

Zou Hui stood there with his arms folded, very impatient. “Hah? Did you not understand the situation? If you don’t want to get beaten, then behave.”

Wen Qing stared at Zou Hui and suddenly laughed. “Are you really doing this for the headmaster’s inscription? Or did you just casually find an excuse, purely to bully others?” After saying that, he threw the calligraphy scroll in his hand to the ground and spread his hands in front of him. “Help yourself.”〗

“Holy shit, brother, that’s hardcore! You really aren’t afraid of getting beaten!” Song Hao clicked frantically to keep going through the plot.

〖Zou Hui sneered, clearly furious already. “A little bit of cleverness. What’s there to fight over in that old man’s writing? The headmaster wants to choose a husband for Miss Kong from within the academy, so I’m letting you suffer a little in advance, so you’ll understand what thoughts you should have and what thoughts you shouldn’t.”

Wen Qing said in disbelief, “Are you going to beat your way through the entire academy?”

Zou Hui: “Not that. I’m only beating up the few ranked higher than me. I’ve already gone after third and fourth place. They’re a pair of Longyang, always pulling at each other, and I couldn’t be bothered with them. Today I’m beating you first, and tomorrow it’ll be that whatever-his-name-is Yuan Hao.”〗

Song Hao had originally been listening to the Longyang part with great interest, but then the gossip ended up landing on his own head. “Huh? I’m getting beaten too?”

〖At Zou Hui’s command, one underling grabbed one side each of Wen Qing and pinned him to the wall. Just as they were about to strike, they suddenly heard movement in the bushes behind them.

Zou Hui: “Who’s there!? Get out here!”

You have been discovered. At this moment, you will:

Step Forward / Also Longyang / Slip Away〗

“What kind of trash options are these? I’ve got 6 Physique. Who am I afraid of? Step Forward!” Song Hao swung his mouse and charged in!

〖Yuan Hao stepped out from behind the bushes and said sternly, “No time like the present. Yuan has delivered himself right to your door, and I absolutely will not sit by and watch such despicable conduct from the likes of you!”

Zou Hui said disdainfully, “Don’t cry too loudly in a moment.”

As soon as he finished speaking, Zou Hui swung his fist and struck Yuan Hao square in the face!

※ Physique -1

Then he stuck out a leg to trip Yuan Hao and planted one foot on his back!

※ Physique -1〗

“Hey hey hey, what are you doing! Why am I not fighting back!?” Song Hao anxiously slammed his mouse.

〖Zou Hui: “What a weakling, and you still dared to show off!” He gathered strength and kicked Yuan Hao hard, sending him rolling several meters away.

※ Physique -2〗

“Holy shit! Retreat, retreat, not fighting anymore, not fighting anymore! Don’t let me die here in a minute! Load, load!” Song Hao furiously reloaded, sending the time back to the moment he was discovered.

Wen Qing was so loyal and righteous. If he ran away himself, that would be way too cowardly. Besides, he was still planning to keep visiting Wen Qing’s house later to farm stats.

And so, there was only one option left.

〖Yuan Hao stepped out from behind the bushes and said in a fluster, “Stop! Wen Qing is my lover!”〗