LA ⋆ Chapter 24: Resisting the Absurd

In that instant, Cheng Ai could no longer hold back. He took a long stride, crossed the distance in two or three steps, and scooped Sheng Yao into his arms, pressing him firmly against his chest.

Words turned to white mist and dissipated from his mouth. Against Sheng Yao's ear came a warm, soft voice: "I'm serious."

Sheng Yao was easier to hold than imagined, smaller than he looked, light enough to be kneaded into nothing in those arms. Yet he was also exactly like his nature—seemingly soft and pliable, but with a hidden toughness underneath, more resilient than anything else.

Sheng Yao smiled. "I know."

Cheng Ai nodded slightly, letting Sheng Yao look at him, his eyes asking a silent question.

"If you weren't serious, it would be easier to turn this into a transactional thing and get what you want. But you didn't. You have the patience to watch small movies with me for two months."

"So what are you thinking?" His heartbeat crashed violently and forcefully in his chest.

"I'm planning to resist the absurd." Before Cheng Ai could process what that meant, Sheng Yao tilted his head up, leaned forward slightly, and easily kissed Cheng Ai's lips.

The exposed skin was bitterly cold, his tongue like melting snow.

Once Cheng Ai came to his senses, he cradled the back of Sheng Yao's head and kissed back hard.

When you love someone, it really is true that you want to swallow them whole.

"Cheng Ai, mmph, Cheng Ai," Sheng Yao retreated and pushed and fought for air, "stop for a moment."

Cheng Ai didn't want to waste time talking. Over the past few years he'd held back painfully, and every kiss he'd imagined he wanted to make up for. But when Sheng Yao called for a stop, he stopped, waiting for him to speak.

"I'm a social outcast," Sheng Yao pulled back a little distance. "I don't know if you can understand this. I can work, I can socialize, I can function like a normal person, but everything involving other people drains my energy. The truth is my level of socialization is very low."

Cheng Ai cupped Sheng Yao's face. "What about me? Do I drain you too?"

"You're like winter heating. You make me want to get close, and I can't refuse."

Cheng Ai pressed Sheng Yao back into his embrace, hearing that voice so close, coming from his chest: "So I'm also afraid of hurting you when I'm not careful. I wanted to tell you ahead of time."

"I know," Cheng Ai increased the pressure of his arms.

It was a very long embrace, not as intense as a kiss, but with a strength that was sustained and continuous, like a current of warmth flowing through their connected limbs to reach the heart.

Sheng Yao continued: "My memories of New Year in the past haven't been good. From when I was five or six, my dad wasn't around. My mom, for triple pay, would go to work even on New Year's Eve. For other people the most festive day, for me it was even colder and emptier than usual."

Cheng Ai had imagined Sheng Yao's childhood environment might not have been great, but hearing him say it aloud, his heart still ached.

"Then from now on, we'll use today's memory to cover over the memory of New Year."

"Okay."

"It's too cold," Sheng Yao said in a muffled voice. "Let's go back. I'm freezing to death."

Cheng Ai didn't move. Sheng Yao tugged at Cheng Ai's hand, and Cheng Ai quickly kissed his forehead, then pulled him toward the stairwell.

Sheng Yi had already opened the Wang Wang gift pack and was eating Xiao Xiao Su while scrolling on his phone, the Spring Festival Gala playing on the TV as background noise. When the two returned, Sheng Yi's gaze quickly swept across their interlocked hands. He shifted, making space on the sofa.

"So," Sheng Yi looked at Cheng Ai, "should I call you brother-in-law or sister-in-law?"

This kid always threw a thunderbolt out of nowhere. Sheng Yao smacked the top of Sheng Yi's head. Sheng Yi didn't flinch. "I'm just looking out for you."

Cheng Ai laughed softly. "Just call me ge.[[1]]"

"No way," Sheng Yi turned his head away. "I don't even call him that."

Both Sheng Yi and Sheng Yao were the sort of perceptive people who saw through things, so no one asked why Cheng Ai wasn't spending New Year's Eve with his family, but had come here instead.

The three of them chatted idly about work and studies, and somehow it felt like they'd slipped back into late-night dorm conversations from high school. Back then "the future" was a distant place, and as long as they hadn't arrived there yet, it remained infinitely beautiful.

Sheng Yao reflected on why this illusion had formed and concluded: life must shed its skin too. In this moment, he seemed to have another future to look forward to.

At midnight, the clock chimed, and "Unforgettable Tonight"[[2]] arrived on schedule. Outside the window, all was quiet.

Sheng Yao walked Cheng Ai downstairs. The two tacitly maintained some distance, nothing too intimate. Breaking through personal space was something that needed getting used to, but fortunately, shifting from "two" to "a couple" was a positive pull.

Sheng Yao said, see you, Cheng Ai. Cheng Ai said, see you after the New Year, Sheng Yao.

Actually, that personal distance was only something Sheng Yao needed. Cheng Ai was waiting for him to adjust. Heaven knew how much he wanted to just wrap the guy up and carry him into the bedroom. Of course, there were plenty of things to do now! The first thing was to replace everything in the house with couple's items!

Cheng Ai drove alone on the early-morning road. It was already the second day. He put on a good face.