KN | Chapter 32

You Don’t Need to Be Afraid of Me

Zhao Shengge frowned. “Her thanks are hers, mine are mine.”

“Those are two different things.”

There was no such thing as the two of them representing each other.

Perhaps because, in Zhao Shengge’s view, this was something that needed to be clarified with utmost seriousness, he did not realize that when his voice dropped, it took on a faint edge of authority, enough to make both Chen Wan and Zhuo Zhixuan freeze for a moment.

The atmosphere in the hospital room instantly turned strange and heavy, almost tangible.

And perhaps because people were more fragile and muddled than usual when injured, Chen Wan did not understand what Zhao Shengge meant. He only knew that he seemed to have made a mess of things. He parted his lips, looking a little lost, and a little helpless.

Zhao Shengge kept staring at Chen Wan’s thin, slender figure. He even thought he saw Chen Wan’s hand tremble.

For Zhao Shengge himself, it was also an exceptionally rare experience, this sudden tension and irritation, coupled with complete helplessness. He had lived to this day without almost ever experiencing emotions so far beyond his control.

Yet he had absolutely no idea what to do.

He softened his tone. “I…”

Just as Zhuo Zhixuan was about to open his mouth and tell Zhao Shengge not to scare people, his phone rang.

It was Tan Youming, calling to ask how Chen Wan was doing. He had wanted to come too, but his old man had not left yet, and Shen Zongnian had said that if too many of them suddenly walked out at once, it would attract too much attention, so he had given up.

Zhuo Zhixuan was not even exaggerating. “His arm, his leg, his face, all hurt, and he knocked his head bad too.”

Chen Wan: “…”

Tan Youming said at once, “Put me on speaker. I want to talk to Chen Wan.”

Zhuo Zhixuan did. Chen Wan spoke first. “Young Master Tan, it’s me. I’m fine here, nothing serious, so don’t worry.”

Tan Youming asked several more detailed questions, told him to get proper rest, and said that once he was discharged they would all go out to Lion Mountain for a group outing and throw him a discharge party.

Like he was coaxing a child.

Chen Wan smiled and said okay.

Tan Youming caught sight of an elegant, dazzling figure in the middle of the social crowd. His eyes lit up, and he handed the wineglass in his hand back to Shen Zongnian.

He liked gossip himself, so he assumed that sharing gossip might also help Chen Wan snack on a little drama and relax a bit. “Wan, do you know who you saved? Xu Zhiying. Shengge’s fiancée.

Touching her is like offending the Grand Duke Jupiter himself. Zhao Shengge won’t let them off, so relax, he definitely won’t let you suffer this grievance for nothing.”

Chen Wan’s head was burning hot. His throat felt as though it were on fire. He tried his best to force out a normal, calm voice. “It has nothing…”

“Fiancée?” A deep, unhurried male voice came through the speaker, calm, but carrying a quiet pressure. “Did you decide that?”

“…”

Chen Wan turned his head to look at Zhao Shengge.

Given how ambiguous his words sounded, everyone fell silent for a second. Zhuo Zhixuan glanced at Chen Wan, then turned to Zhao Shengge.

Zhao Shengge still looked as calm as ever, impossible to read.

Tan Youming laughed. “Who would dare decide something like that for you, Zhao Shengge? Wasn’t it in Haidu Evening News?” He even copied the tone of a gossip reporter. “‘Financial tycoon Mr. Zhao and the Xu family’s eldest daughter spotted together late at night, suspected of heading to Bay No. 7 in Shallow Water Garden to build their love nest.’”

“…”

Zhao Shengge glanced at Chen Wan. Chen Wan was not looking at him. Zhao Shengge said coolly to Tan Youming, “You wrote it yourself, didn’t you.”

Tan Youming burst out laughing again.

Zhuo Zhixuan considered himself one of the closer friends in their circle, yet he still could not tell whether the two of them were joking or being serious. In the past, when they went out together, they had never talked about this kind of thing.

Or maybe Zhao Shengge only discussed such matters with Shen Zongnian.

He might not know the truth, but he knew there was definitely someone who wanted to know.

So Zhuo Zhixuan deliberately raised his voice and said, “Huadu News Service wrote about it too. Their reporter even got shots of the two of you having dinner together at Seaforden.”

Tan Youming immediately began egging him on. “See? See? It’s not just me who saw it. I wasn’t making things up about you, was I?”

Zhao Shengge asked, “Having dinner means we’re getting engaged?”

Then, whether he was speaking to Zhuo Zhixuan or to Tan Youming, he said in firm, righteous tones, “I will not get engaged to Miss Xu. I only reserve the legal right to sue you and those tabloid magazines for fabricating rumors about my private life.”

Tan Youming laughed and said he should stop pretending to be so proper.

A faint crease appeared between Chen Wan’s brows in confusion. He lifted his head slightly, only to run straight into Zhao Shengge’s gaze, which had been resting on him the whole time.

“…”

Zhao Shengge’s eyes were gentle. He asked him, rather seriously, “What? You’ve seen it too?”

“…”

Chen Wan choked for a moment. “N, no.”

Tan Youming said, “Whether he has or not, this whole thing still happened because of you people. Zhao Shengge, you need to take responsibility.”

Then he told Chen Wan to extort Zhao Shengge properly for a big sum. It was what he deserved.

This time, Zhao Shengge did not refute him.

Tan Youming still had far too much to say, and wanted to keep telling Chen Wan more gossip about Zhao Shengge and Xu Zhiying, but Shen Zongnian took back his phone and said, “Enough. Let Chen Wan rest.”

Only then did Tan Youming stop, and use the wine in his hand to wet his throat.

The phone belonged to Zhuo Zhixuan, but he had barely gotten a chance to speak. His gaze swept discreetly between Zhao Shengge and Chen Wan. He used to think he did not quite understand Chen Wan. Now he felt that he did not quite understand Zhao Shengge either.

A nurse came to ask someone to go sign the paperwork. Zhuo Zhixuan considered himself much closer to Chen Wan than Zhao Shengge was, so he very consciously went out with the nurse.

The hospital room was left with only Zhao Shengge and Chen Wan.

Chen Wan saw that Zhao Shengge was still looking at him, and did not quite understand what it meant. He could only smile politely.

“…”

But Zhao Shengge thought his complexion looked a little better now, and his expression no longer looked as shattered as it had moments before. That put him somewhat at ease.

He walked over, bent down slightly, and raised a hand.

Chen Wan instinctively leaned back a little, his breathing stopping completely.

Zhao Shengge stopped, glanced at him, and Chen Wan blinked, the two of them staring at each other at close range.

Zhao Shengge waited until Chen Wan had adjusted to the distance before continuing what he had been doing. Only then did Chen Wan realize that Zhao Shengge had merely wanted to adjust the position of his IV drip to make the infusion flow more smoothly.

“…Thank you.” Chen Wan, wrapped in his cold, crisp scent, said awkwardly.

When Zhao Shengge lifted his hand, the ring on it flashed for an instant. The family crest on his little finger carried a restrained, mysterious gleam.

Then suddenly, that signet ring was extended right in front of him, very close.

“…”

Chen Wan looked up. “?”

Looking into his eyes, Zhao Shengge said, “Didn’t you want to look at it?”

“…No.”

“Chen Wan.” Only after confirming that the skin around the needle site had not swollen or turned purple did Zhao Shengge sit back down. After a moment’s thought, he asked, “Are you very afraid of me?”

His voice was low and steady, but under the blanket, Chen Wan’s hand moved slightly.

This was not really a question.

It was a statement.

Zhao Shengge never talked in a normal, predictable way. Talking to him felt like riding a roller coaster.

Chen Wan looked at Zhao Shengge and smiled. “No. Mr. Zhao, why would you ask that?”

Zhao Shengge was seated, so the two of them were almost at eye level. His gaze, level and calm and gentle, was also very direct, and it gave people the sense of great depth. You could never see through what he was thinking, but under that gaze, every tiny thought of the person being watched seemed to have nowhere to hide.

“No?” Zhao Shengge looked at him with deep concentration, his dark gaze sweeping across Chen Wan’s brows, his eyes, his lips.

The atmosphere in the room shifted from the previous stiffness into something subtle, impossible to put into words, yet the two of them each appeared more natural and composed than the other.

“No.” This time, Chen Wan meant it sincerely.

He had never been afraid of Zhao Shengge, no matter what kind of person Zhao Shengge was said to be in other people’s mouths.

“As long as that’s the case,” Zhao Shengge said, “then you don’t need to be afraid of me.”

Chen Wan felt that he really had hit his head hard enough to damage his brain.

In this state, he was slower and duller than usual. Less sharp, less proper, less guarded, less flawlessly defended. Catching a glimpse of the part of Chen Wan that existed outside all his armor and masks made Zhao Shengge feel that Chen Wan was very real, vividly alive, and soft.

So he repeated himself. “You don’t need to be afraid of me.”

His tone was serious, and so was his expression. It made him seem especially reliable.

Chen Wan said okay, and looked very obedient when he did.

Zhao Shengge picked up the medicine the doctor had prescribed for him and checked it very carefully. As he looked through it, he asked, “Chen Wan, how many days did the doctor recommend you stay in the hospital?”

Chen Wan said, “I’m only staying overnight for observation. If nothing’s wrong tomorrow, then I’ll…”

“Chen Wan.” Zhao Shengge interrupted him softly. He paused, and there was a trace of helplessness in his tone. “I’m asking for the doctor’s recommendation.”

“Not your own opinion.”

Chen Wan: “…”

In fact, Zhao Shengge’s tone was very calm. It was not like a boss speaking to a subordinate. It was more like an elder questioning a child, slightly disapproving, slightly speechless, but not fierce. Even so, it would still make you unconsciously straighten your back and answer honestly.

So Chen Wan could only respond a bit blankly, telling the truth. “One week.”

“Mhm.” Zhao Shengge thought that when Chen Wan answered honestly like this, he looked rather well-behaved. Not like when he had just said, “Thank you, Mr. Zhao, but no need,” which had made people angry.

So Zhao Shengge automatically ignored the fact that Chen Wan himself had been planning to leave the hospital tomorrow, and asked, “If I have someone stand guard outside your room, will that disturb you?”

“What?”

“Those desperadoes haven’t been caught yet. Retaliation is still possible.” Zhao Shengge sounded extremely serious. “I’m worried they’ll come looking for you.”

Chen Wan immediately turned serious too. “Oh. Okay. No, it won’t.”

Zhao Shengge added, “I’ll also send someone to take care of you. It’s inconvenient for you to be here by yourself.”

Before Chen Wan could say anything, Zhao Shengge continued, “Zhuo Zhixuan won’t be at ease either.”

“But if you’d rather have me owe you this favor, then when you eventually decide what you want, you can come ask me for it then.”

Zhao Shengge was far too sure of himself. Chen Wan was absolutely not the kind of person who would ever exploit a kindness and put a price on it.

Sure enough, Chen Wan agreed.

The corner of Zhao Shengge’s lips curved upward almost imperceptibly.

The doctor on the night shift came in during rounds and said that Chen Wan’s physical condition was poor to begin with, and that injuring the area around his brain and then seeking treatment alone had been extremely dangerous.

Zhao Shengge fell silent, and no one knew what he was thinking.

The doctor said Chen Wan should not sit upright for too long, and asked Zhao Shengge to adjust the height of the bed for him.

When Zhao Shengge came closer, Chen Wan caught the scent of Da Hong Pao tea from him, faintly clinging to his collar and cuffs.

Fortunately, once Zhao Shengge adjusted the bed, he straightened up again very quickly.

Chen Wan let out a small breath of relief. “Mr. Zhao, is it really alright for you to be out this long? If you have things to do, you should go back first. My condition really isn’t serious.”

Tonight was an extremely important moment for Minglong. Zhao Shengge definitely had a great many matters to deal with.

Zhao Shengge said he only needed to show his face. As for going on stage to speak, giving interviews, dealing with guests and the media, there were other people for that.

He guessed that Chen Wan was asking this because he wanted him to leave as soon as possible.

“Tired?” Zhao Shengge was tall, with broad shoulders, and he blocked part of the bright white light. His expression was sunk in shadow and impossible to read. “If you’re tired, then close your eyes and rest. Once Zhuo Zhixuan comes back, I’ll go.”

Chen Wan was entirely enveloped in his shadow, as if he were being surrounded by Zhao Shengge himself.

Maybe it was because the doctor had prescribed him medication to calm his nerves. Or maybe it was because Zhao Shengge, by nature, made people feel dependable and at ease. By the time Zhuo Zhixuan came back after finishing the paperwork, Chen Wan had truly fallen asleep.

Running all over the place was exhausting. Zhuo Zhixuan, a pampered young master, had never personally handled things like this before. There had been waiting in line, collecting medicine, one thing after another.

Chen Wan being hurt had already put him on edge, and in his anxious rush he had nearly gotten into an argument with someone. So when he came back, he did not notice that the thermos flask on the bedside cabinet had already been filled with hot water, or that Chen Wan’s phone, with one corner chipped from the impact, had already been plugged in to charge.

Zhao Shengge said he was leaving first. He had to immediately send people to start tracking down those men. Then he instructed Zhuo Zhixuan to keep an eye on the veins on the back of Chen Wan’s hand and adjust the IV drip rate at any time.

He spoke briefly throughout, basically just relaying the ward-round doctor’s instructions. Concise, to the point, calm in tone, with no obvious trace of personal emotion or concern mixed in.

Although Zhuo Zhixuan had held quite a few grievances against him lately, at this moment, looking at his tall back and hearing those few sparse sentences, he suddenly felt that Zhao Shengge had changed back into the big brother from his childhood memories.

Actually, in Zhuo Zhixuan’s heart, Zhao Shengge had always been an older brother.

Back when they were kids, among the children of Haishi’s elite circles, who had not wanted an older brother like Zhao Shengge?

If you got into trouble, he would tell you it was fine.

If you ran out of money, you could swipe his card.

He would generously lend you his limited-edition mountain bike, and would not hold it against you even if you damaged it.

Zhao Shengge would never get angry.

Zhao Shengge always had a solution.

As long as Zhao Shengge was there, there was nothing that could not be solved.

In Zhuo Zhixuan’s memories, Zhao Shengge had been like this since a very young age. He had always thought of him as a mountain. When they were children, he had been a small mountain. Once grown, he had become a towering one.

Like a jade peak that did not speak, broad and impossible to break.

He was always there, a support his friends could lean on.

But as people grew older, many things became less pure. Everyone was changing. Tan Youming grew more and more arrogant. Shen Zongnian grew gloomier and gloomier. Zhao Shengge also grew colder and colder.

That coldness seeped out from the bone. Even though he still seemed as he had in childhood, gentle, dependable, responsible, good to his friends, generous and open-handed, at some point Zhuo Zhixuan had simply known that Zhao Shengge was no longer the older brother he kept in his heart.

Maybe it started on the day he stopped playing games and messing around with them because of Zhao Maozheng’s surveillance.

Maybe it started on the day he no longer even spared a second glance for a stray dog on the roadside.

Maybe it started on the day he stopped showing mercy after one of their former friends made a mistake.

It had been too long. Zhuo Zhixuan no longer knew when Zhao Shengge, or everyone else, including himself, had started to change.

People like them probably found it hard to have sincerity, or true friendship. Even if they had once possessed it, it changed all too easily.

That was why Chen Wan seemed especially rare, and especially precious.

And yet, on this night, in Chen Wan’s hospital room, Zhuo Zhixuan felt that big brother had come back.