BB | Chapter 8

Straight Men Really Have No Sense of Restraint When They Start Selling Themselves…

After seeing Qin Chun off, Shen Canglan and Li Yaochen were also preparing to leave Yunjian City.

It wasn’t that Yunjian City was bad.

It was just that big cities were expensive. The various subsidies Shen Canglan had received before leaving had already been half spent on lodging alone in just a few days, and that was with them constantly taking quests and money still coming in.

But before leaving, the two of them still decided to go back to the notice board and see if there were any suitable quests they could take to earn a little more.

Today, however, the notice board was a little different from usual.

Even from far away, Shen Canglan could see a large crowd gathered there.

People were packed three layers deep, and Shen Canglan couldn’t squeeze in, so he grabbed someone and asked, “Daoist friend, what’s going on?”

The person he stopped was a short, somewhat plump middle-aged cultivator.

When he saw Shen Canglan speaking to him, his face lit up with surprise.

He asked, “Daoist friend, are you asking me?”

Shen Canglan could roughly understand the middle-aged cultivator’s surprise.

People always said that you couldn’t judge by appearances. But in a world where everyone wanted to flirt a little, having a good face was a huge advantage and often made you more popular.

Someone like this middle-aged cultivator would probably not get spoken to all year unless he was strong enough or rich enough.

Shen Canglan nodded very coolly at him. “Yes.”

The middle-aged cultivator looked at Shen Canglan with moved eyes.

He explained carefully, “Daoist friend, do you know about the Yun family of Yunjian City? They’re the wealthiest family in our city. It’s just that the Yun family has always been low-key; they keep to themselves and rarely show their faces.”

“But every few years, the Yun family holds an auction and brings out all the fine things they’ve collected for everyone to admire.”

“And I’ve also heard that the auction is actually just a pretext. In truth, if someone performs well at the auction, they may end up marrying one of the Yun family’s young ladies or young masters.” The middle-aged cultivator sighed after saying this. “It’s a pity I won’t be able to go.”

“Why not?” Shen Canglan asked. “Is there some condition for attending the auction?”

The middle-aged cultivator explained very dutifully, “You have to get an invitation.”

Li Yaochen raised a brow. “Easy enough.”

He had attended several auctions before. The heavenly iron he had used for forging, the Soul-Stabilizing Herb that could steady the spirit during breakthroughs, and even some odd little curiosities had all been obtained at auctions.

Back then he had been a prodigy of the heavens, flattered by everyone, and auction invitations had been delivered right into his hands. There were plenty he’d glanced through in the catalog and then couldn’t be bothered to attend. Times were different now.

But as for invitations, most organizers would set some conditions—rare materials, spirit pets, spirit beasts, that sort of thing. It would just mean fighting a few matches. Not difficult.

So Li Yaochen asked the middle-aged cultivator, “What are the conditions for getting an invitation?”

The middle-aged cultivator said, “A lottery draw.”

Li Yaochen: “?”

He asked, “What’s a lottery draw?”

The middle-aged cultivator said, “You sign up first, and they’ll give you a number. From tomorrow until five days later, a staff member will draw fifty numbers on-site every day. If your number comes up, you can get an invitation. The invitation can’t be resold and can only be used by the person named on it. At most, you can bring one other person. There’s nothing they can do about it—there are too many scalpers now.”

Li Yaochen: “?”

What kind of ridiculous way was that to distribute invitations?

His luck had never been great. Otherwise, he wouldn’t have been struck by lightning during his tribulation and thrown into this baffling world, only to end up with a System that insisted he fall in love.

Hearing this from the middle-aged cultivator, two big words immediately surfaced in Li Yaochen’s mind—forget it.

Anyway, they couldn’t afford anything.

The thought had barely formed when he heard Shen Canglan say, “Then forget it too.”

Shen Canglan counted on his fingers and analyzed, “There are so many people here. Even if we draw, we might not get picked. We’d also have to stay here five extra days for lodging, which isn’t worth it.”

So although he’d long wanted to see what the legendary auction was like, he still made the decision very calmly, rationally, handsomely, domineeringly, and perfectly: “Let’s go, brother.”

He lifted a foot to leave, but Li Yaochen didn’t move.

Shen Canglan looked back at him. “Hm?”

Li Yaochen met his gaze, then asked the middle-aged cultivator, “Pardon me, where can I get a catalog of the items?”

The middle-aged cultivator laughed. “I just brought a few over.”

As he spoke, he took a few palm-sized booklets from his sleeve, selected one, and handed it to Li Yaochen. “Daoist friend, if you want it, take it.”

Li Yaochen thanked him.

The crowd before the notice board was growing larger and larger. When Shen Canglan and the others first arrived, they’d still been at the very outer ring, but by now they were already surrounded in the middle.

The smell was mixed, and so were the voices. Li Yaochen lifted the booklet in his hand toward Shen Canglan. “Let’s find a quiet place and take a look.”

Shen Canglan naturally agreed immediately.

The two of them squeezed out of the crowd and went to a tree nearby.

Li Yaochen opened the booklet, and Shen Canglan leaned over to look.

Li Yaochen was a little taller than him, and he held the booklet high, so Shen Canglan had to look a bit awkwardly, but he didn’t say anything.

Li Yaochen glanced at him and lowered his arm a little.

Using his experience, Li Yaochen told Shen Canglan, “Generally, the items in front aren’t very good. We can start from the last page and flip backward.”

The very last item:

A pill that, once taken, would let you bear triplets. It could make anyone pregnant, regardless of gender or race. Starting bid— to match the only currency Shen Canglan currently had on him, he automatically converted it to copper coins: 99,990,000 copper coins.

The second-to-last item:

An ancient jade pendant. Hold it while you sleep, and you can travel into a stretch of history from a former dynasty. If, within eight dreams, you successfully save the prince who was abused since childhood, the prince’s soul will be freed from the pendant and take human form to fall in love with you. Starting bid: 88,880,000 copper coins.

The third-to-last item:

A miraculous painting scroll. What if the person you like has no physical body? Paint them onto the scroll, and your beloved can immediately have a genuine, tangible body. Starting bid: 66,660,000 copper coins.

Shen Canglan: “……”

Li Yaochen: “……”

They had been careless.

They’d forgotten that everyone here loved love, love, and more love. No wonder all these magic treasures were this kind of thing.

Li Yaochen laughed in exasperation. “Then let’s start from the front instead. Maybe the things everyone doesn’t need are exactly the things we need.”

Hearing that, Shen Canglan’s disappointment eased a little at once.

He leaned a bit closer to Li Yaochen. “True.”

He moved too much, and his face brushed against Li Yaochen’s shoulder. Shen Canglan quickly pulled back. “Sorry, brother.”

Li Yaochen smiled. “It’s fine, brother.”

Then he lifted his hand and flipped the booklet to the first page.

–

The first item was a waist sash. Pale yellow in color, starting bid: fifty copper coins.

“If I’m not mistaken,” Li Yaochen said after looking at it for a while, “this isn’t just a waist sash—it’s also protective gear. Look, there are defensive runes carved on the waist area. It might help its owner block one fatal strike. And it’s yellow, which goes perfectly with the color of your usual clothes. We can get this.”

Turning another page, there was a roll of bandages, starting bid: fifteen copper coins.

Li Yaochen raised a brow. “Hey, I had something similar before. Wrap it around a wound and it’ll heal in no time. We can get one for brother as a spare.”

After looking for a while, Shen Canglan sincerely sighed, “The things in front are much more interesting.”

By then, Li Yaochen had already fully immersed himself in shopping—

“This cloak is not bad. I’ll buy one for brother so you won’t be afraid of the cold, even in ice and snow.”

“These boots are pretty, and cheap too. I don’t know what special ability they have yet, but they really suit brother.”

“Look at this curved blade, brother—beautiful enough. You still don’t have a weapon that feels right, do you? Let’s buy this and give it to you.”

“This dress has rather unusual material. We could buy it and have it tailored into an undershirt for brother.”

Shen Canglan listened with delight, almost able to imagine how imposing he would look once he was properly decked out in all these items.

But vaguely, he also felt that something was off.

He asked Li Yaochen, “Brother, then what are you buying?”

Li Yaochen patted his shoulder like a big brother. “I’m already very content just buying for you.”

A warm current surged through Shen Canglan’s heart.

He said very movedly, “As long as I have something to eat in the future, brother, you definitely won’t go hungry.”

“Suddenly saying things like this?” Li Yaochen held back a laugh. “Then if we encounter danger in the future, as long as I’m still breathing, I’ll definitely protect you properly.”

Shen Canglan was not to be outdone. “In the future, when I’m rich enough to rival a nation, brother, you’ll be overflowing with gold and jade too!”

Li Yaochen’s competitive spirit was stirred as well. “In the future, when my name is known throughout the world, I’ll make sure everyone in the world knows your name too.”

【Stop, stop.】

The System’s voice sounded painfully miserable. 【I’m begging you, can you please stop talking?】

Li Yaochen: “.”

He said, “These are perfectly normal conversations. How can you think of them that way? Your thoughts are so strange.”

The System said weakly, 【It’s clearly you straight men selling yourselves with no sense of restraint…】

Li Yaochen shook his head and decided not to bother with it anymore.

The System kept sighing in his mind.

–

Since the auction really did have some good things, the two of them decided to stay a while longer. After first signing up, they went back to the inn.

Both of their money pouches were already so empty they were almost flat, so they told the innkeeper to move Li Yaochen into Shen Canglan’s room and trouble him to add another bed.

The innkeeper agreed very quickly and even made a happy sound: “★☆↑↓~~~”

After going upstairs and eating fasting pills, the two of them each sat cross-legged on their own beds to cultivate.

With the mantra Li Yaochen had taught him, Shen Canglan’s progress could be called lightning fast. Although he didn’t spend much time cultivating each day, ever since three days ago he had already been hovering at the edge of Foundation Establishment.

Shen Canglan could clearly feel his cultivation becoming more and more abundant, his dantian fuller and fuller.

But the problem also lay here.

No matter how much he cultivated, he still couldn’t cross the line into Foundation Establishment. It was clearly right in front of him, yet he couldn’t touch it. That feeling was deeply frustrating.

Although Li Yaochen had not opened his eyes, as if sensing his disappointment, he opened them from the opposite bed. “What’s wrong, brother?”

Shen Canglan frowned. “Still the same old problem. I just can’t break through.”

Li Yaochen rested his chin on his hand and thought for a long time.

Then suddenly his eyes lit up, and he slapped a fist into his palm. “I’ve got it!”

He looked at Shen Canglan with excitement. “Let’s have a fight, brother!”