GP | Chapter 2.1

It was a dark night, with the sky already dim at the edges.

Taejoon sighed, pressing a hand to his throbbing head. He had been forced into more exertion than he had planned, after taking on an unexpected job. He wanted to rest at the temporary lodging in the Esper Center, but Director Park Sungmin had insisted on kicking him out. Saying there was somewhere he “had to go.”

Taejoon had tried to protest, but that man was the only opponent he could never beat. Staring at the front door in front of him, Taejoon dragged a hand down his face.

“…Ha.”

He usually kept a smiling face on him, but now he did not even have the luxury of that. The inside of his eyes felt swollen enough to crush his brain, and lava seemed to be boiling inside his skull. Every blood vessel in his body felt stretched to the limit, blood surging wherever it wanted.

If it got any worse, the pain would start, the kind where it no longer felt like blood but fire was burning through his veins. After that came reason slipping away, and if he could not control his power, it would end in rampage. The only ones who could calm an Esper in that state were Guides, but because no one could guarantee the Guide ’s survival, rampaging Espers were usually put down.

Later, people might look into why the rampage happened and hand out punishment if the Guide had been at fault, but could that punishment ever carry the same weight as death? In the end, the one who suffered was the Esper.

So resistance was inevitable. To Guides, Espers were nothing more than tools to maintain power, nothing more and nothing less.

“…”

And then, all at once, completely out of nowhere, he thought of the Guide behind that door. The one who had said he understood an Esper’s pain.

It was ridiculous. Just how desperate did you have to be to trot out such a hollow excuse? If he were truly soft-hearted, he would know how disgusting that lie was.

Acting like he knew everything, like he understood everything. He was probably targeting an Esper’s weak point and trying to handle him however he pleased, a sly, shameless bastard beneath that innocent-looking face.

If another Esper had been in his place, they would have done whatever the guy wanted, but not him. He would make that Guide beg with his own mouth to be sent back to the Guide Center.

It was a simple thing, one that did not even require preparation. Time would naturally bring the opportunity. The only problem was having to endure until then, but looking at his condition now, that day felt close.

Come to think of it, today had been especially rough.

Taejoon rubbed the back of his neck and checked his condition. Apart from the pain, his body felt heavy. Dull, almost. Everything he normally found pleasant felt unpleasant now. The scent of grass, the sound of the wind, even the cool air touching his skin. Usually his nerves sharpened and his senses grew keen, but today was the opposite.

He needed to rest as soon as possible. If he went in, washed up, and slept like the dead somewhere quiet, maybe he would feel a little better.

Taejoon shook his head and opened the front door. He was heading into the silent house and toward the stairs when something suddenly rushed into his arms. He reflexively reached out and caught it, but before he could react, someone’s voice reached him.

“S-sorry…”

He had known Yoon Seoh was home. But he had not expected this at all.

Guiding energy flooded in through the arms that had collided. His startled body, numb with pain, opened up to the sensation and began to absorb it greedily.

For one brief moment, a thrill so intense it felt like he might lose his mind shot through him. Everything he had been forcing down started to run wild the instant the guiding began.

It clung to the energy that was gently stroking it, begging and pleading. Hurry up and make it easier, let more in, more, more. The resolve he had so firmly held shattered miserably in the face of instinct.

It had been guiding he did not want, but ironically, the breath that had felt jammed tight seemed to open a little. That only made it worse. This was not enough. A desperate urge rose up to hurl himself into that warm, soft energy.

But the last shred of reason barely managed to apply the brakes. He tried to push away the small body in his arms, gathering strength in his hand.

“…!”

His head tilted with the pull of slender arms wrapping around his neck. Now the energy poured in not from his arms but from the nape of his neck. There was no resisting it. The moment something soft touched his lips, even more guiding energy surged in.

He could not hold out any longer.

His mind began to flicker, blinking in and out.

I did not want to do it like this…

Seoh squeezed his eyes shut and tightened both arms. He slipped his tongue a little into the slightly parted mouth of Song Taejoon. The instant tongue and flesh met, he could feel the guiding energy that had been tormenting his whole body pouring out.

He had not intended to do it without a word, like this, all of a sudden, but he had gone past the limit of endurance, and there was no helping it. Song Taejoon had not come back for two days, and the desperation he had felt while waiting for him had been unbearable.

He had stayed curled up by the front door all that time. The moment he tried to straighten up, the things he had been holding down would spread through his whole body and tear him apart, so he could not move.

Breathing hurt, so he endured, endured, endured, and when oxygen grew scarce, he gulped in air. How many times had he muttered “please” while hugging himself? By the end, he had been sobbing and begging without stopping.

So in the end, he had forced himself to guide him. Skin contact had not been enough, so he had even pressed their lips together. It had been because he was desperate to feel better faster.

So he was truly sorry, and ashamed, and also hurt that he had shown up so late. If only he had come back a little earlier, it would not have come to this. If they had been in a state where they could talk, then maybe…

“Ugh, hngh!”

Just as those thoughts ran wild, his lips suddenly parted wide and something thick invaded his mouth.

The pressure pressing down on the back of his neck crushed his lips until they felt mangled, and the flesh filling his mouth licked over the lining here and there, clinging with relentless persistence.

It was shoved so deeply into his throat it felt like he could not breathe, and at times it sucked at his tongue hard enough to hurt.

Even as his wet, invaded mouth was being toyed with, he could not help feeling pleased that the energy was draining faster than before.

Want more. Just a little more. He could give more than this, and even if it wanted to take everything, he could give it all.

Seoh pressed his whole body against him and wrapped himself around Song Taejoon’s neck. When his head tilted left, he braced his face against a shoulder and tightened his hold even more. He was so desperate their lips were being mashed together.

“Mph, mmph…”

Taejoon’s remaining arm wrapped around Seoh’s waist and pulled him in. Once he stopped him from backing away, their bodies fit together without a single gap. And yet Taejoon kept pressing forward, forcing Seoh’s waist to arch backward. His feet on the floor were starting to lose all meaning.

Even through that, wet friction and muffled sounds kept spilling out from deep in the throat.

“Hah… mm… mph.”

Seoh felt his head growing hazier and hazier. More energy was pouring through his mouth than through his skin, so he could not keep his mind straight. If kissing felt like this, then he could not even imagine how intense it would be to go further.

I do not want to let go.

More, more, …more.

It was when his consciousness had grown distant and his breath was about to fail, when his mind had already gone white and he could no longer think, that his body was suddenly shoved back. As the lips that had felt like one finally separated, his chest rose sharply.

“Gah!”

He sucked in air in a rush, and his throat and lungs jerked hard enough to hurt. His head rang, buzzing as though he had been on the verge of passing out from oxygen deprivation.

“…Hngh. Cough!”

Once one cough burst out, it kept coming. He coughed helplessly, and his body swayed backward before he landed on his butt. But before he could even feel the pain, a low voice cut in.

“What the hell are you doing all of a sudden?”

Seoh opened his blurry eyes and looked up. Song Taejoon was there, covering his mouth with the back of his hand and glaring. It looked like knives might shoot out of his eyes any second and slit his throat.

“Who told you to guide me however you wanted?”

“…”

“Fuck, seriously… are you that desperate you can’t hold out? You think you’re going to die just because you couldn’t do it for a few days?”

Seoh moved his mouth, then gave up and looked away. Had he not already expected this? Even knowing what would happen, he still could not endure. He had thought he wanted to respect him, but once confronted with pain, resolve fell behind.

There had been times when he resented or got angry over being dragged helplessly by instinct, but that had been a long time ago. Even spending emotion was a luxury now, so all he could do was quietly sink down.

Taejoon rubbed his lips irritably at Seoh’s mute, excuse-less response. The lingering sensation was soft, and instead of soothing him, it only made him more annoyed. It was as if it was mocking him, saying Espers really could not help themselves, and if they wanted a Guide , they should just grovel properly. His mind started to churn in a different way.

He growled at Seoh, who kept avoiding his gaze.

“Don’t mistake it for something where if you throw your body at me, I’ll just take it all. Thinking that way already makes you nothing but a whore. I wondered for a second, but the rumors really were true.”

“…”

“Disgusting.”

The sharp words were aimed squarely at Seoh, but Seoh took them with unexpected calm. He was too used to hearing that kind of thing to be shocked, so it hardly bothered him. What worried him now was this relationship. It did not have to be good, but they at least needed to be able to talk, and that seemed unlikely now.

Seoh rolled his eyes and slowly looked back up at Song Taejoon. He was dragging a hand over his face and breathing hard. The white breath from his mouth was not from the cold, but from his ability, frozen into the air.

Watching the pale mist drift away, Seoh swallowed dryly. The surrounding temperature was dropping little by little. It was still early autumn, not hot and not cold, but the weather felt like winter might suddenly descend at any moment.

The cool air made his skin contract and pebble up. Seoh hunched his shoulders and rubbed his arms and forearms with both hands.

Did he get… really angry?

Even to Seoh, who had met many Espers, Song Taejoon was outside the norm. No Esper had ever refused guiding when offered.